@franchesca, I would love and appreciate that. @lp1988727 I am focusing in on my son ... it's what keeps me strong , but as his due date gets closer reality hurts so bad... I just want my baby here already. my self esteem is so low almost non existent. ...I honestly don't know how or how long it was happening but I can't believe I allowed this.... I can't even recognize myself in the mirror

It isn't easy at all. I myself can say the same im kind hearted I wish everyone the best but I try to put together why life has weighed me down so much but when we have those little bundle of joys in our arms I have hope that all that im going through will be a thing of the past so I can bust my butt to bring me and child forward and give the best example it can ever receive from anyone if you'd like to keep in contact let me know.

You have every right to be emotional! It can get overwhelming. With my first I couldn't deal with her father. He wasn't a bad person, he was just lazy & never helped. I knew that if I stayed, there would be no good future for me or my daughter. I knew I could do more. Probably 6 months into my pregnancy I had enough but I stayed because of his promises but honestly, in my heart, it had been over a long time ago. I just tried for my daughter. But you can't change anyone. So after a year I left & moved. Oh he said all kinds of things to me to try to bring me down but now, he's exactly where I left him!!!! And us? We're living the life that was meant to be for us. I'm not rich, but we are in a good place financially, spiritually, mentally. I never once have asked for his help, he doesn't pay me child support, he doesn't visit (I'm the one that buys our plane tickets to take my daughter to see him), and it's been 6 years of this. I met my husband who is amazing! He does not deserve your attention after cheating on you. Of course it hurts and it will hurt for awhile but let that make you stronger. It'll feel so good to say to yourself that YOU did it!

@franchesca, it's not easy... and yes I wish we were closer too... I'm gaining strength slowly but surely. .. but I'm not a bad person I try to figure out why I deserve this... I just don't understand why he did and is doing what he's doing. .. I feel humiliated worthless and afraid..... just constantly going through pain and suffering ....

I wish you lived closer I wouldn't mind keeping you company because as much as you need it I need it too.

Mine did the same to me after nearly 7yrs now that I'm pregnant it hit the fan that he had two other kids from two different women and me the one that's been in his life from the gecco is having his third he doesn't reach out to me at all its like the years nor this baby matter and im trying to be strong so try along with me because God knows it's not easy and I miss him because he's the closest person to this situation because he's the father but I can't force him to care

@emc229, that resonated really deep... thank you.. for your message! I just wish I wasn't so emotional about everything he did to me and my son.... he made me think I was crazy and a monster.... just to find out that he had been cheating on me and living a double life.... I'm so lost

You don't need him! What you're feeling is just the need of company & love... not because you need him next to you. Don't give in to that! Just know that you can do anything you set your mind to as long as you do it with a good heart.

@lp1988727, thank you I do need friends... he kept me isolated so being on my own now is harder than ever before.

@lp1988727, I'd rather do it all myself, I don't want his money. he's a narcissist, master manipulator, pathological liar! he abused me in so many ways... I know we deserve way better.... but it's been torture .... trying to pick up the pieces he left me in....