16 Years To Life....The story of our miracle baby:
DH & I have been married nearly 20 years & have raised 2 kids from my first marriage, who are now 25 & 22 years old. Sixteen (16) years ago I had to have a hysterectomy due to severe endometriosis. Before I lost everything my female plumbing, we decided to try an egg retrieval, so we could try for a biological baby of our own, using a surrogate to carry out child. We were lucky enough to collect 8, six of which fertilized, creating six embryos Unfortunately, our first try 16 years ago failed, leaving us with only 4 frozen embryos left and, no chance for any more thanks to loss of my uterus & ovaries. However, after years of saving $$, 4 start/stops with potential candidates over the years, we finally got to try again. By God's amazing graces, ONE of our four little embryos made it! After 16 years on ice, she's now 19 wks along & due in Oct 3rd.
The most common, and frankly expected, reaction is "Wow! That's amazing (((hug)))!" Then the follow-up..."Are you crazy? You guys are already mid-40s with older kids just finishing college!"
To which we reply: "Hell ya, we're crazy!" The chances were so slim, we didn't expect it to work at all. But we couldn't destroy our little embryos (heck, we saw them fertlized & divide!) -- Of course we were ready if it did work (still shocked, but ready) So yep, we know, we're crazy. Yes we're scared...and happier...then we've ever been! Clearly God works on His timeline, not ours."
The only negative response we've received is actually a lack of response. My hubby's brother & sister-in-law won't even acknowledge that we are having a baby!??! I'm not kidding, they haven't said congrats, oh well, you're stupid, nothing! Not one word! It's not like they just found out & need time to adjust. We announced our PG 7 wks ago! Even at yesterday's mother's day BBQ, people were talking about the baby, baby names, looking at ultrasound pics & our surrogate's belly bump-growing nicely with our miracle baby girl! And they just sat there liking around the room like nothing had been said. I just don't get it. We're so confused, and DH is heartbroken.
Truth be told, my sister-in-law & I have never been close. From the beginning I wasn't good enough for DH, a divorcee with 2 little ones + plenty of other family drama along the way. But for crying out loud, that was 20 years ago. I think we've demonstrated we are in this for the long haul LOL ;-) What's more is that We see them every few days and only live a mile apart. DH is very close to brother & now he's actually furious! In fact, my mild-mannered, never raise his voice husband, claims that if they don't get on board and welcome "little girl" soon, they won't be a part of our life after! And he means a clean break!
What to do? I get that they may still not like me...fine, we can live with that. BUT how can they not so much as acknowledge that their brother is expecting his first baby? Could they be jealous? I'm lost, any thoughts, different points of view are welcome. I want to be able to get thru this without anger in my heart. Thus far I'm falling miserably.