I've always lived in the north east. I've moved around the NE, just NY and NJ. It's cold there, and expensive, and I've…

I grew up in CT and was shocked when I left the tristate area how openly prejudiced some people were. I never heard anyone use slurs or say anything outwardly racist but definitely heard them say things that showed their bias and prejudices — things that made my mouth drop open and things I never would’ve heard where I lived in CT. (Not just racial things but also about LGBTQ as well.) I moved out of the NE about 9 years ago and that was a huge culture shock. Some people are even more openly racist and homophobic here.

NE will always be considered home to me & it’s my comfort zone so I will admit I’m a little biased to thinking it’s a pretty great place to live and have a family, despite being expensive. Anyway, a lot of rambling here but just sharing that this white girl was blown away by things I’ve heard or seen outside of the NE & I think your worries are justified.

https://www.cbs46.com/news/study-atlanta-is-not-the-number-1-metro-area-for-african-american-advancement/article_4f437c80-c276-11ea-8b48-675c78cb12b0.html

Here ya go. This is one of the latest.

I totally get this, but I’m a west coast native. I’ve traveled the US and the world and a private nurse so I’ve seen a lot. Had experiences in the south with the police where I was made to feel less than human. Deciding where to live is very hard, especially as POC.

7 years ago, we started looking at other places to live. The Bay Area and NY are similar in cost of living and we were getting tired of making great money and not seeing it. We considered the top 10 cities for African Americans to thrive back then. Almost everything was in the south or on the East Coast. While we considered a few cities I have family in and checked them out, I realized I’m way too liberal for most of the US, and I have real fears for my husband and son in other parts of the country. In the end, I kept my liberal self on the liberal west coast. I feel safer here than I do in most of the country. Texas, OK, KY, FL...you could feel the racism way too much and I just couldn’t.

Now I’m glad we stayed where we are because we now live in the number one area for African Americans to thrive and be successful in the US. We did move, but from The Bay to the State Capital where rent is half as much. I ended up in one of the best places in the country for children with autism, I’m still in a liberal hot spot, and we didn’t lose that much money moving here. Matter of fact the tax rate is 2.25% less than 100 miles away.

It’s a tough decision but in the end you do what’s best for your family unit...

I’ve lived all over and I like Oklahoma best lol cheap and lots of country I dont care for Florida

I’ve only ever lived in the South, and even with military moves, we have stayed in the South. I grew up in Georgia and have moved to North Carolina, Alabama, and Florida (where I currently live). My husband grew up in Detroit, and he wants to stay down South when he retires. He loves it and was glad to get away from the winters.

I’m sorry you are afraid though, but I understand. I can’t speak from experience with most of that, because frankly I am a white woman. But I can say my husband is black, and as an interracial couple, we have not yet lived in a place where we (or him) felt unsafe. I say “not yet” because I’m not naive and I know not everyone has the same experience in all places down south (or anywhere for that matter). That’s a sad reality. I’m hope that wherever you choose to move, you have a great experience and find an amazing place to raise your family. ❤️

I understand. NE is my comfort zone. I do not see myself living anywhere else. I’ve lived in FL for a short period of my adult life before having a child and hated it.

I was only there for studies. Once I graduated, I went back up NE for good. You do and go where it is beneficial for you and your family👍

It really sucks that you’re afraid to move somewhere but I can understand that right now of course. Come move to the suburbs outside of Philly. You’re always welcomed here!!

Have you considered Michigan or Ohio? Depending on where you go, the cost of living is pretty low. You’d still have winter like the Northeast, but it sure is beautiful in my state. If you want to be in a metropolitan area, Grand Rapids, MI is nice. I can appreciate your concerns, though.