Ladies I need advice!

Amethyst is getting to a point with her attitude where I’m not sure what to do. She’s defiant, she’s starting to lie and tells me no to pretty much everything and tells me stop.

I’ve tried reasoning with her, time outs, nap times, taking things away from her and spanking after a certain amount of time having to tell her not to do something.

She gets into everything all the time, and I know that that is normal but when I tell her to not mess with something and I remove it she will throw herself to the ground crying.

If I ask her to stop doing something she looks at me and gives me that look like “I’m cute I can do what I want” or that “make me” look.

When I spank her she will cry for a few seconds then go straight back to what she had just got into trouble for.

I’m trying to train our dog and whenever I do Amethyst yells at me to stop.

I have caught her poking the dogs eye while she’s asleep or pulling her tail and when I tell her not to do that because it’s not nice she says back “I didn’t do it”

She acts like she is in control and my fiancé and I just don’t know what to do anymore.

Help!!