Opinions! I’m pregnant with my ex boyfriends third child it is our second together. Our daughter is 3, we split up a week before I found out I was pregnant. He doesn’t want to fix things. And I’ve been trying to sorta ask him to come home but found out some news that completely broke my heart. I sorta started to talk to someone that doesn’t live in my state but works around my area sometimes.. we spent some time together while he was here and he will be back in 3 weeks.. am I doing something wrong I feel weird I’m pregnant...
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I feel odd. I’m not really ready but he’s definitely keeping my mind off being depressed
Don't use an individual to get out of depression, that's something you will need to get out of by yourself or you may end up dependent on said individual and if they dip out you're back to square 1
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So just get child support u don’t have to be with the dad no big deal 🤷🏼♀️
@mumtothree, file anyway they will handle it they a take it out his check that’s what I do and they do paternity too
@kush_queen420, he’s not saying they aren’t his at all.. and I didn’t want to file...
@mumtothree, o got ya no I know but if he’s not helping u should
i’ve got two questions, are you happy? and are your children happy?
if your answer to those questions is yes, then fuck it and do what brings happiness. life is waaay too short to be worried about what others think or what they’d do. you didn’t plan it, but it happened, and it happened for a reason. you don’t have to explain it or defend it. it’s not about anyone but you and your children. and it DAMN SURE ain’t about your ex whether it’s his baby or not. if you wanna date someone else then too fucking bad if he likes it or not. if you were clearly running around with multiple guys and sleeping with everyone then yes, he has a right to be concerned. but that’s quite the opposite of what you’re doing and far from it. so fuck his opinion lol. make yourself happy. especially when pregnancy can make it hard to be happy at times let alone going through so much during it. happiness is great for a pregnant woman. not being stressed and depressed. so enjoy your happiness! whether it’s a temporary thing or a lifetime, enjoy it! ♥️🙌🏼
That made me pretty happy to hear!! I wanted him to come home, I wanted to fix things in my heart I wish they could.. but this was a long tome in the making of us breaking up... so it’s been unhappy for almost a year now. I’m not ready to settle down again.. but a friend someone that’s sweet and kind to me is just what I need right now
@mumtothree, exactly. it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks, you KNOW the truth and how your relationship was to know you’re done. and what you want. and that’s the point too, you’re not even looking for a relationship just a little flirty friend to make ya feel good and there’s nothing wrong with that. especially when he’s got a whole girlfriend over there that happens to be an ex.
My whole things was is it wrong to be getting to know someone else. This isn’t the situation I wanted or even wished for.. but if I am talking to someone now and they are totally freaked out by the fact that I’m pregnant and dealing with a recent break up and want to be there. Well I’m not planning on pushing him away
It's not wrong to get to know someone else but you should work on yourself and your mental health first and foremost. I feel like things have already been a bit too rushed with him meeting your kids already but it is what it is.
I did almost this exact thing. My soon to be ex husband left me in october 2 days after I told him I was pregnant because he was seeing someone else. Day after Thanksgiving me and my bf started talking and I was 20 weeks pregnant then, I told him everything going on and he chose to stay... Needless to say my kids havent even asked about their dad and my bf shows them and me more love and affection than their father ever did.
How did u and the new guy meet if u don’t mind my asking? So u and your other bf broke up 2mths ago? Is that right? I’m sorry that happened and you’re left pregnant and without him. It doesn’t sound Like you’re really over him yet which isn’t hard to believe as it’s only been a short amount of time. So the new guy has met your children already? That seems quick imo, but that’s only my opinion. Like @massgirl, said they also went though a break up. How are the older 2 taking it? That’s a lot for them to process, losing the Man U were dating and meeting another man. That’s a lot for a 13, 12 &3 year old to handle. A lot of change in a short period of time. Def make sure they are mentally prepared before jumping right into another relationship and being pregnant. Like I said that’s a lot to handle for such young kids. Even the older ones. They are old enough to know what’s going on here. How long were u with the other man, the one who’s the baby’s father? Like was he a father figure to the older kids? And he’s the 3 year olds father correct? Is he still seeing his child? I mean the new man knows you’re pregnant so that’s a good thing but it all seems like you’re moving very fast. Good luck that’s a lot for u to handle too
@ss3mom, well it was a tense situation he wasn’t always the nicest.. they didn’t like him.. he drank a lot and after he gave up on his son my son lost respect for him.. and my daughter hates men because the man that adopted her unadopted her...
@mumtothree, damn they have been through a lot. Are they ok?
@ss3mom, they are happier now. My daughters almost 14 so she has an attitude anyways lol
I'm been in your shoes. My ex husband and I started our divorce proceedings when I was like 3 months along. I met my future ex boyfriend when I was pregnant. We were only friends. There's nothing wrong with what you're doing, sometimes being desired helps you heal faster. It did for me. Don't get into deep and still make your kids your priority.
Of course my kids are my world.. I never thought this would happen and I don’t see him much we text send cute photos that’s kinda it right now
You’re not wrong. Girl do whatever you want. If your kids are taken care of then you’re good. Just because your pregnant doesn’t mean anything. A good friend of mine meet her now ex 5 months pregnant. He took on her daughter. Even after they broke up he’s still there for their daughter that isn’t biologically his. If you want to fuck around with someone new, do it. Be safe and don’t introduce him to your kids until y’all are serious. But there’s nothing wrong with it. I wouldn’t talk to your ex and a new guy at the same time. If you’re not enjoy the distraction.
@bigmama18 this^^^...but just to add be cautious with your kids. They went through a break up too. Also you never know his true intentions. Sometimes "he loves kids" can be a red flag
@massgirl, I get what you mean. I’m probably not saying it quite right he has his own 10 year old mine are 13 12 and 3 and one on the way..I’m just talking right now.
@mumtothree I understand. Just be cautious is my point. If it helps you heal definitely keep talking to him.
I spoke to the guy I’m talking to he knows everything. And I’m not trying to get into a relationship at all. I gave up asking my ex to come home when I found so disappointing news about what he did..
@beetlejuice_beetlejuice_beetlejuice, he just told me he just wanted space I think if he had intentions on fixing us with some space then he shouldn’t have been doing anything like I wasn’t.. I just started talking to him we split up over two months ago now..
@bigmama18 I was asking a simple question. 🙄
@mumtothree men say things ALL the time. They don't always mean them and most times they say "it's just a break" so you're sitting there waiting for when THEY are ready to come back. It seems like neither him nor the current girlfriend care. Just take it one day at a time and concentrate on your health first and foremost
I'm gonna be blunt. Right now you should concentrate on your kids and your pregnancy not jumping into another relationship.
You also shouldn't be trying to get your ex to come back/come home when you're actively talking to another individual. You should also inform any individual you are thinking of dating about the pregnancy if you haven't already.
I feel odd. I’m not really ready but he’s definitely keeping my mind off being depressed
Don't use an individual to get out of depression, that's something you will need to get out of by yourself or you may end up dependent on said individual and if they dip out you're back to square 1
Nothing wrong with that. Your relationship didn’t work out, it’s okay to move on when you’re ready to and not for the wrong reasons.
As long as your future partner knows you’re pregnant who cares.
I'm gonna be blunt. Right now you should concentrate on your kids and your pregnancy not jumping into another relationship.
You also shouldn't be trying to get your ex to come back/come home when you're actively talking to another individual. You should also inform any individual you are thinking of dating about the pregnancy if you haven't already.