I just realized something that kinda breaks my heart. Usually all day it's just my youngest and I.…

I just realized something that kinda breaks my heart. Usually all day it's just my youngest and I. My oldest is usually at school. When he gets home, he eats a snack, does his homework, then takes a nap for an hour or so and plays with his brother or plays by himself( he likes to hang out alone). Weekends, my step boys are here along with my 2 boys. So X(my oldest) and I never get one on one anymore. Every once in a long time, we go grocery shopping together, but never just hang out one on one. Today, my youngest is currently napping. X and I are cuddling watching TV. Just hanging out. Relaxing. And I didn't realize how much I needed this with him till now. We are always so busy. Always so distracted. I feel Soo freaking bad.