All this stress this person is causing me is making me so sick and I don't know what to do. Its not…

All this stress this person is causing me is making me so sick and I don't know what to do. Its not fair. I want to feel healthy again. All I'm scared of letting my parents down. Because they think this man is great. That hes there for me and my kids. That we have a real relationship. But all that is fake. It's an illusion that he makes for his friends family and my family. It's all fake. Horribly he believes it because he fakes it to much. Im so terrified of being alone, probably why he still lives here

It seriously has gotten bad (because I used to live alone) I was at the gas station tonight. It was only me and the cashier at the store. And I kept looking over my shoulder because i.was freaked put about it just being us and on the way home which is right down the street. I'm at a red light and I see a guy walking across the street and past my car and i hit themlo I button t my car. I don't know why I'm like that. I'm not like that all the time only sometimes. A lot of times. But I dont deserve to treated the way I am (of course I'm the one treating him wrong he'll say) but no. I'm making calls tomorrow and going to figure something out. It's been to long and not getting anywhere. And go from there. I really don't know what I'm going to do.