"I feel very fortunate to be happily married to my husband of 12 years, but that doesn’t mean I…

"I feel very fortunate to be happily married to my husband of 12 years, but that doesn’t mean I don’t wish I could go back and re-write our wedding vows if I had the chance.

If we were to renew our wedding vows today, I’d want them to be much more specific in nature. You know, have ’em get at what holy matrimony really entails.

1.) I PROMISE TO TOLERATE YOUR FAMILY … EVEN IF THEY’RE BUNCH OF MORONS.

Let’s be real: I’m not only accepting this man to have and to hold until the day that I die, but...