So my whole pregnancy was a crazy roller coaster ride the whole way through. Come to find out I had twins but one died…

So my whole pregnancy was a crazy roller coaster ride the whole way through. Come to find out I had twins but one died before 7wks. Which is why they told me my baby died but they didn’t tell me I still had a baby until 7wks later??? Yet my best friend found out she was prego a few days after? How tf does that happen??? I’m so confused and hurt.. why would they lie like that? Anyway it’s a rejoicing time that i still have one of the twins but it still hurts I didn’t get to birth them both... Did I do something wrong? How come other moms have amazing pregnancy’s where they have multiples with no problem? Idk how to be present with my 3month old and mourn the loss of her other half? Her Dad doesn’t even know yet but he will so flip shit if he finds out... idk how to tell him? I almost lost my 3month old as well but they were able to save her. I’m so confused... someone please tell me it’s not true.... I didn’t lose one of my babies.... I feel like such a bad parent.... I wanted to so badly believe it wasn’t real so that I could have a good pregnancy I knew I couldn’t successfully carry my living baby if I started mourning... But it hits home when people are like is that your first? How do you make everything right again? I’m lost to myself.