HELP PLEASE. .Need yalls advise on the situation, please read everything and then respond on what you would do and how... Ryan is my boyfriend of 3&1/2 years, we got together when I was almost 4 months pregnant with our daughter, we live in missouri... Her biological father wasn't in the picture after I had found out about my pregnancy at about 6weeks because he immediately started trying to cause a miscarriage by abusing me, he died on halloween; bio fathers parents (who live in ny) have since been in contact with me about my daughter and them wanting to be involved to a point. Well their attorney called my phone today.. Left a voice message saying that they wanted to know if we'd cooperate with a DNA test through them through the family courts in NY. Ryan's said I can deny the DNA testing.. Problem with denying it is that since they have their attorney involved it means that they probably already have paperwork going through the court if we say no so its just prolonging the inevitable there. They were messaging me today about coming to Missouri to visit and meet Ryan and our daughter again and I told Ryan about them asking and that they said that they wanted to take us all out one day and do dinner or something with all of us after I told them Ryan and I hadn't decided if it was a good idea yet and that IF we did decide to let them visit they would not be left alone with our daughter at all and her and I wouldn't go anywhere with them unless Ryan was with us too. they said that they completely understood that due to them being strangers and all but I just don't know what to do and Ryan is understandably frustrated about it all and so I don't really know who else to talk to. Like I get that they are biologically connected but its been two years, and they didn't care until after their son died. And now they just want to jump into our lives. Ryan's been through so much with the accident and being out of work and stressing about finances and me trying to apply at places and dealing with the cop stuff and everything and they just add that much more stress just by sending gifts and wanting to be involved and now wanting to visit and filing for DNA testing in NY. I filed for DNA testing to be done through dfs here in Missouri already about 2months ago because they told me it could get benefits for our daughter and because it is their steps when filing for TANF and bio gparents already know that
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@sherrynygirl yes i met them once before I was pregnant and this is the first time since then that they have ever talked to me about anything was immediately after their son passed. They do seem to want to be involved but they admitted they knew about her as soon as he moved back to NY after he tried to cause miscarriage. My boyfriend has been her dad since before she was born, he chose to be in our lives and has been the best dad to her. I want him there because he is her dad he is the love of my life and they said they want to meet him and get to know us all and I don't want him to feel pushed away all because they want to be involve all the sudden, I'll look into a legal aide office. @laniejay yes they knew but cut off contact with him after he made threats towards them and had restraining orders against him@mia.mcc they told me they knew but didn't have contact with him due to them having restraining orders against him for threats he made and so they say they didn't know how to contact me. But 3 days after he took his life they suddenly found my facebook
He sounds like a good man and yes he has been raising her good luck
Sounds like it was safer for you and your daughter that they didnt have contact. Sounds like they're smart people who had your daughter's best interest at heart and that they contacted as soon as it was safe to do so.
Did they know about the child? Perhaps their son asked them not to and they were stuck between a rock and a hard place.
Trying to better understand ,Is this the 1st time your hearing from the grandparent's at all? (Since their son passed? Did you ever meet his parent's before you were pregnant or during your pregnancy. I Would say being an exp..older mother.its a nice gesture they are sending gifts to their granddaughter,I would visit with them with her in your state..not sure why your man has to be there might be more akward. .but, if they are taking time to fly to u and visit and make an effort and got an attorney they really seem interested in being in your little girl's life.whatever way her bio dad acted has nothing to do with his parent's and how they will treat you and your child.Hire a lawyer too if you can't afford one at moment go to a legal aide office in every city has one explain your personal situation and(Know Your rights
@momof3cuties @chadandtanya14 @mommylovesaria0816 we can't afford an attorney Missouri does have grand parents visitation rights. We have no intention on leaving her alone with either of them
If they get right then theu will have her every other weekend weeks in the summer and some holidays. Bit sucks but the court has to be fair.
I wouldnt leave them alone with her at all. I would stay in public places but if they rights there then I would follow along with the attorney and cooperate and show you can be fair as well. They havent asked for her to be with them alone and just want to take u all out. Some places have free attorneys who you can work with. But I think they will fight for rights if your state has rights for them. They lost their son so your daughter is the only connection to him that they have left
Do everything through your courts not theirs. Every state has different family laws. So please look into an attorney because you never know if there may even be something where the grandparents get visitation etc. Have a lawyer look into it. I’d have the dinner with them but not leave her with them.
I havent the slightest clue as eh at I would do. But here I know grandparents have rights and if they are involving their attorney then I think they are going to try and get their rights. Ig you fight it then it might prolong the situation for now but they might take more steps or could have done that already for visitation. Its stressful I get it xus my brothers daughters mom took her 8 years ago and disappeared off the face of the earth and our attorney said we can fights for rights and much more and have her found. We didnt go that route but his parents might since they had their attorney contact you already.
It depends in the laws in your state on grandparents rights. My ex in laws took us to court for visits and got declined any rights
Mama, first and foremost my heart goes out to you in your predicament. Please follow the advice above and get an attorney. Whether you can afford it or not you cannot afford not to as the law can be quite tricky. The law doesn't care about the details and if your state has grandparent rights in the statutes you're in for a rough tumble without legal counsel. This is a complicated situation and I pray that these people truly are good people who only want what is best for your little girl and to know their granddaughter. Sadly, situations like this often turn into costly court feuds with the winner being whoever has the most money and the grandparents legally stealing the kid away in the proceedings. Don't delay get an attorney today!!! Keep in mind also, most lawyers who are worth their salt have free consultations and will help at least get you started in the right direction. Best wishes!