Sorry just need to vent...
My brother is really very hurtful to me. Though nothing he says is about or really to me. Things he says about our mother and just his general attitude make me not want him in my life. It's really hard because I still love him but he knows that I disagree with him about our mother and he still says things in front of me anyway.
I unfriended him on Facebook because a lot of the stuff he posts is just about him being angry at something (and he curses a TON), but sometimes it can be offensive and hurtful to me. I'm having a baby in a month or less so I decided I don't need that extra stress in my life. But I wonder if I did the wrong thing. I've tried talking to him and asking him not to say things about our mother but his attitude about it is "bull s, I'll say what I want"
He acts like he doesn't care about me but then gets upset when I also act like he doesn't care about me. He's told me I need to stop acting like he doesn't care but that's hard when I don't think he does.
I originally wanted him to come and be here when I have my first baby, but recently he's said some things about my parents and my mother that have changed my mind. I don't want him around at all anymore. That makes me feel like a bad person but I don't know what I'm supposed to do. There's not really anything I can do.
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Girl, whatever’s going on between him and your guyss mother is between them. Although you don’t like how he speaks of your mother, take into consideration what kind of relationship they have. Just because she’s his mother doesn’t mean anything to an extent. He’s an adult and has his own feelings and you should be able to respect that. Find a common ground.
“Look bro, Idk what kind of relationship you guys have but I don’t want to hear you speak badly of our mother. You can very much vent to me about her but it makes me uncomfortable the way you shit talk her. I don’t want toxic people around my children and if you cannot respect me enough to do that then we’re going to have to limit contact.”
Remember, he doesn’t need to be BFFs with your mom. And if you truly care about where his frustrations are coming from, ask him why he feels so badly about your mom. There’s her side, his side, and the truth. Find the truth before you pick a side
You only get the family "loved one's your given" maybe not perfect but that's what sets them differently from others. I know you say you don't want him around because of things he has said but you should set aside feelings for your brother vs. his feelings towards your parents. Maybe he ranches out to say things to you about them because he's hurt somewhere n it's way to vent to his sister about it. I have two brothers they mean the world to me I think if you want your brother around when you give birth tell him let him know. If you feel like he doesn't care about you show him how to and change the routine so he knows the feelings mutual. Good luck. Pray on it. Hope things work itself out.