I dont wanna give up breast feeding. But i think i have to. My supply dropped to almost nothing while i was at the hospital with my oldest and im not really producing much anymore even now that im home. I thpught about just pumping for her but that takes up time and when im at the hospital with miguel i cannpt keep a pumping schedule with a room full of people and doctors nurses and miguel needing my full attention. I feel like im failing my children. I failed to see that there was something wrong withb miguel, im failing at breastfeeding lyla, marcus has been acting up and struggleing in school so i feel like i failed him somewhere and Mia is getting sassier by the day probably due to lack of attention. Im failing in every aspect of motherhood right now and its killing me. My depression meds arent even tpuching the sadness i feel in my heart.
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@mom4m, can you bring a cooler to keep in the room and they can just bring you ice when needed?
@laniejay im proud of myself that ive done it for these last 2 months. My sons oncologist told me that 2 months is a great accomplishment and itd be okay if i stopped. Whats even crazier is the hospital encourages mothers to breastfeed. And they have pumping rooms all over the hospital but they cannot provide me a place to store my breastmilk inside the hospital id have to walk to the ronald mcdonald house to put it in the fridge and thats about a 20 minute walk.
You are in NO WAY failing. You are holding down the fort in every aspect. I truly believe the biggest blessing in having a sibling is learning that it’s not always about themselves. Sometimes my youngest needs more attention than my oldest, sometimes the other way around. This is a season and from an outsiders perspective (i have followed your posts from afar) you are a rock star who is doing everything you can to take care of a crazy crazy season in your family’s story. Hang in there mama 💙
First- no one could fault you for not continuing. Second, if you truly want to pump- you can pump bedside with a nursing cover. I pumped bedside for 124 days. Not fun, but doable. I also used a hands free pump in the car on the way to and home from the hospital. Again, only if it’s truly what you want to continue. You can also
Look into donor milk.
No matter which way baby is fed.. all that matters is baby gets fed! You’re doing amazing mama. You have so so so much going on right now! Whatever you decide to do, that’s the best decision for you and yours! Nobody can bad talk that. If you want to continue pumping you can look into a good cooler maybe that you can save up the milk for the day before taking it to the Ronald McDonald House? That way you don’t have to walk there every time? And if you decide on formula that’s okay too! They also do donor milk programs. You got this mama 💕