Mom.life
Meybelline
meybellinel14
Meybelline
Ladies i have a question. What do you guys think a man should do if the women is not working? Should he give her spending money like to buy groceries and things for the baby? Should he help out with some of her bills? Or should she be responsible for whatever she needs even though she’s at home w a newborn and cooks and cleans!?
01.09.2018

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meybellinel14
meybellinel14
@kristcoleman88, same! That’s how i was raised. A man takes care of the family. But i know in this day and age it doesn’t work like that so i don’t expect it out of my Bf. He’s been babied all his life. I just wish i would’ve set some ground rules when i was pregnant.
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meybellinel14
meybellinel14
@tacos4lyfe, my mom said the same thing. She’s trying to help us out but if he’s not even giving me anything she’s gonna charge him for rent and she’ll help me. I mean we’ve been together for almost 8 yrs but it’s different now. I didn’t expect anything from him before. Not even when i was pregnant did i ask for anything. I just don’t understand why it won’t come out of him like why do i even have to address it. But i have too.
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householdceo
householdceo
My mom and dad have joint accounts as well
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householdceo
householdceo
Well my mom and grandma have been sahm for long as i remember. My dad pays all the bills they owe and gives my mom grocery money and other things. She will sometimes ask to get something done and he will do it. If she gets change back she keeps it lol i have a pretty great dad. He works sun up to sun down and helps at the house.
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little_mommy_of_3
little_mommy_of_3
@meybellinel14, it’s definitely tough being that y’all didn’t plan to start a family but he’s got to man up. He’s got a child and if he expects you to work and pay your own way then he’s going to need to pay half for childcare, half of all expenses for your baby, and pay something to your mom for rent that can go toward helping you financially.
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meybellinel14
meybellinel14
@tacos4lyfe, that’s what my mom said. And i literally have one more note left next month and the car is mine. I will def have a talk w him and see what we’re going to do. I just don’t know what to say or how to say it without being mean. Ive never been the person to ask for anything from anyone. If I’m struggling i usually find a way on my own. But we’re a family now and I’m down right now. If it was the other way around i would be the total opposite. We come from two diff cultures as well so i think that has a lot to do with it as well...
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little_mommy_of_3
little_mommy_of_3
@meybellinel14, definitely need to address this with your boyfriend. If you guys have decided to be a family then you need to mutually agree how to financially support the family. If your car payment is too high then maybe you need to sell your car but if you guys can work it in the budget then okay. But if he’s just leaving you “high and dry” with no money then you need to put him on child support at the very least
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meybellinel14
meybellinel14
See we are pretty young and have never lived together due to him being in school in a different city. So now it’s like we’re a family and everything is still separate. Idk how to address it. Or idk if i should at all?
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My husband and I have a joint bank account so I can take as needed. Other than groceries we talk about big spending (anything over 100$). He knows and trust that I'm not reckless with money
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meybellinel14
meybellinel14
@tacos4lyfe, we are living w my mom Bc baby wasn’t planned and he was in school on scholarship so they paid for his rent. So my mom let us stay here until we can get on our feet and we don’t pay rent. But i have bills prior to living here like car note, phone bill etc. Not house bills necessarily.
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little_mommy_of_3
little_mommy_of_3
Assuming this is a family unit then the money the man makes should be the spending money for the whole family until mom can go back to work (if that’s what they decide)... why are the bills separate? I’m confused...do they live together?
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meybellinel14
meybellinel14
@kellynicole, this is about me and my relationship. I am currently broke lol. But he works full time and gives me 0$.
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kellynicole
kellynicole
Depends on how comfortable you are financially speaking
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