I feel so bad for my baby boy he did not want to go with his father tonight clung on to my mom and…

Have you asked him if his dad has hurt him maybe :/ ? Maybe he's just so attached to you

@k.i.k.i, idk if he would understand me asking him that. And I don’t think it’s me cause he’s never like that when he goes to my dads. And I’m never even here on Fridays i’m working. But every time he goes there he comes back like more attached then before. And my mom said the last time he went he acted like he had no idea who his father even was and wasn’t interested in going with him then either but he didn’t cry or get upset like this time.

@missjess do you think his father would be capable of hitting him

He sounds heartless ://

@k.i.k.i, he is heartless. And honestly idk what the guy is capable of. I know he is neglectful for sure.

@missjess oh man that would make me so nervous I'm sorry

@k.i.k.i, yeah it makes me sick and no one will do anything about it. :/ and now this so it’s like wth is going on up there

Does your son have to go his dads? It could just be because he doesn’t get any attention or love from his dad so he’s just extra needy when he gets home. My best friends mom gave her 3 daughters the choice whether to go to their dads or not sometimes they did sometimes they didn’t and when they didn’t want to they would throw major tantrums just because they were bored at their dads because he just played video games the whole time. But my mom left me with many different abusive people and I would always cry that I didn’t want to go and hold onto her for dear life but she knew what was going on and just didn’t care cause she’s a bad person. I think you should at least give it a shot asking your son if anything has happened with his dad. Look up videos about how to ask children about being hurt. Do some research so you feel better about how to ask but please ask or don’t send him to his dads anymore! It sounds like his dad doesn’t really care that much to have time with him anyway and if he does want time do things together so you’re there also.

@mia.mcc, he doesn’t care! Idk why he bothers to be honest. He’s cold and distant to my son there is nothing theRe. Idk if my son would understand me asking if he hurts him or not. But I know something is going on for him to be acting like this because my son isn’t like that with anyone ever not even people he barely sees. But it’s court ordered so I have to send him I can’t not. And no court is going to be like oh he doesn’t have to go they will just say it’s normal 😕🙄 but it’s not.

@missjess, I don’t know much about court ordered situations but can’t you talk with his dad and just say if you don’t want to take him as often I’d love more time with him. Just to make it a more positive way of asking... also have you tried asking your son why he gets so upset when it’s time to go to dads?

@mia.mcc, his did would flip out if I ever said anything like that to him. I’d rather just not say anything. He barely shows up for the time he does get with him. He only comes for his every other weekend and half the time I don’t think he’s present. And my son doesn’t really talk a whole lot where we can understand him yet. So I don’t think me asking him I would get an answer I could understand or if he would understand what I’m asking. I’m never here when he goes with him either I always work Friday nights.

@missjess, oh okay😕 maybe a nanny cam teddy bear? Or just showing up unexpectedly as a “surprise”

@mia.mcc, I’ve thought about a spy cam but they are really expensive and idk how well it would work. And he lives 3 hours away and I don’t drive :/

@missjess, are you there when he drops him off? Or can you be? Maybe you 3 could go out to eat and that way at least each visit is left on a good note with his dad. If it’s not abuse related maybe just try a few things to make visits more positive. Also FaceTiming with him while he’s with his dad if you don’t already. And have you talked to his dad about showing his son more affection? Or even just telling his son he loves him more at least. Cause having a dad that is so cold can really cause your son a lot of problems as he grows up. Maybe you could talk with someone who handles court ordered visits and get them to do something like he can’t see his son until he goes to counseling or classes of some kind. Idk anything about all that but it just seems like there has to be something they can make him do to learn how to treat his son.

@mia.mcc, his dad won’t do any of that :/ he’s a douche. He will flip out at anything I say about anything like that. And say I don’t know anything about anything. And yes I’m always here when he brings him home. It’s always super brief. We aren’t really in the greatest of terms we are at a civil point but I had to call CPS on him over the winter and bring him back to court for neglect issues and violations of our court order and I was always fighting with him about it and him doing dumb shit. But we’ve been ok lately arguing with him gets me no where. He’s a narcissist and he has serious issues. He never wanted my son and it’s obvious. Idk what his deal is he needs to step up and start being a father cause he’s only hurting our child but he doesn’t see it that way cause he lives in his own little fantasy world where he does no wrong and is some like god like father and he’s the worst father. He’s a sperm donor.

@missjess, if he’s a sperm donor why does he even have visitation rights? There should be a way where you can have his rights taken away and get him out of your sons life! Especially since you have the cps report and any texts that you might have to make him look bad. There has to be something you can do. Talk to cps or anyone who will listen and try to get them to help you and give advice on what to do cause there has to be a way.

@missjess, I’m sorry if what I said sounded judgy! I’m not judging at all just trying to help

@mia.mcc, they won’t :/ no one will do anything cause there isn’t enough evidence to do anything. The courts won’t do anything either. Basically something horrible has to happen to my child for anyone to do anything 🤬

@missjess, even though he’s a sperm donor though? Didn’t you guys have to sign paperwork saying he doesn’t have rights?

@mia.mcc, lol, he’s not an actual just sperm donor but I call him that cause he mine as well be cause he’s such a piece of garbage father.

@mia.mcc, my boyfriend is more genuine about my son than his father. That’s sad :/ when my son was born his father showed no excitement no smiles no joy no nothing. He was emotionless robot. He was like dead inside. And he still acts the same way. :/ my son deserves so much better! He is the sweetest, funniest, just best little boy. I don’t know what I would do with out him he’s my entire universe ( I say this with tears in my eyes) and it kills me that his father doesn’t feel the same. There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for him if he needed every organ in my body I would give them to him without hesitation. He is our families blessing and angel. He has saved us all in my twin brothers death. And it just kills me that such an amazing little boy could leave a man so cold and heartless:( it’s not right it makes me sick.

@missjess, oh lol got it... well darn I’m sorry for both of you:( I’m out of ideas but I will definitely pray for you both and pray that he finds a way to be a better father! One other idea is instead of going out to eat maybe a movie then you don’t have to talk lol

@mia.mcc, i honestly don’t want to even do anything with him :/ I’ve tried in the past to push for us to be better co parents together but at this point it’s not happening. Maybe when my son is older we can hopefully get to a better place where we can all do stuff together for our sons sake but at this point I’m lucky I can keep my mouth shut about stuff 😶 he just disgusts me about so many things I wish he would just poof be gone and that’s that lol 🤪

@missjess, you sound like an amazing mom and your son is so lucky to have you! I believe that everything happens for a reason and even though it’s hard to find a reason sometimes maybe it help your son in the future somehow or make him stronger. But regardless he has a wonderful loving mom and that’s an amazing thing💕

@mia.mcc, thanks hun that means a lot, I try! 💖

@missjess, and you can message me anytime to vent or talk or anything❤️

@mia.mcc, thank you!! :)