Is it weird if one of my best friends is kind of my ex? We didn't technically date, we just both had…
Is it weird if one of my best friends is kind of my ex? We didn't technically date, we just both had a thing for eachother and at that time agreed to not date anyone else. I met my fiance and said that I found someone and it cause a little issue but we have always stayed close and he has been in 2 relationships since. We were already the best of friends before it. There are no unresolved or lingering feelings but a few people have told me that I should just cut him off and I am unsure if that is necessary or not. Opinions???
sm;)e·
I wouldn’t be comfortable with my husband being good friends with a person he’s had feelings for. Does your fiancé know about it?
Mercedes Stoddard·
@messybunmom Yeah and he doesn't have a problem. I'm not secretive about it. They get along and my fiance sees our conversations and is frequently around whenever he is.
sm;)e·
I guess if it works for y’all. 🤷🏻♀️❤️
Elisabeth Ortega-Bailey·
It is perfectly fine. Two of my closest friends are actually exes of mine whom I dated way back when. But I've been always been transparent with my husband about how I knew these people and that it was years before we met, I explained why we didn't work out as partners and how a friendship was better fit, and he's actually really good close friends with them as well. I've been with my husband for 5 years and I dated them over 10 years ago. I think people are so stuck in society view of former partners cant be friends and it's really sad. The fact that your partner is aware, and that you were upfront and honest, I think is all that matters.
Mercedes Stoddard·
@ellyium that's awesome. Thank you so much for sharing the story. We don't have a 5+ year gap. It's more like 3.
Amy O.·
Мама дочки (2 года), беременна (31 нед.)
I think the opinion that matters here is your fiancés. If he understands the past “relationship” and has no funny feelings about it, then continue, but if it bothers him in the least, I would strongly encourage separating from that friendship, or set up healthy boundaries like, you all go out to dinner together or a movie etc. When your friend is in a relationship you could go on double dates. Once you are married, you become one, and I believe decisions like this are one and you mutually need to respect and honor the others feelings.
*note- I briefly read through some of the comments about your fiancé being on board with it. You need to discuss if he will still feel this way once married—— for some there is a clear difference between being engaged and married. Just a check in :)
Mercedes Stoddard·
@amysbabies Thank you, so much. ☺