I am suddenly having real serious second thoughts about getting my tubes tied... Which I guess means…

Don’t do it!! If your having thoughts. Get birth control it’s not permanent. Maybe in a few years you’ll want another!!

@dinamarie1995 Yes, thank you. I think I might... I just was thinking like my main reason for getting it done is extreme depression and anxiety and I plan on seeing a pychiatrist and getting on some medication, so that I can be better and happy for my boys. Always be here for them. And truly I think "I won't ever be happy. I won't ever want this again." But isn't the point to become happy... Find help and be happy and I feel like maybe I am selling myself short on something really important. I am only 23yrs old. I was also thinking that my mother has three children and didn't even start until 26. Maybe I will feel better again.... Maybe I will want another child again..

@dinamarie1995 I just feel like a bad mother. Like my children deserve better than I could ever give them, and a lot of days I do not feel I even deserve (or want) to be alive. Sorry if that is morbid to say but it is true. Maybe I will not always feel like this though? Maybe I just do not see myself in the right light.

Dont go that far. There are plenty of bc options in this world to prevent you from going as far as altering your body is such a severe way. And honeslty the procedure is much quicker, easier and less invasive for men... and reversal is much easier and has a higher success rate

@vvrobinson Well I wish that were an option, but I am not with my children's dad. He lives with me and is around, father to both my children, but honestly I am not sure we will ever work it out and be together again. I have no current plans to sleep with him or anyone else.. but like I just don't know. I am really considering just not having sex at all ever (not like there is anything really wrong with that) because I just can't find any birth control that I wanna chance the side effects and the fact I could still get pregnant. I am not sure I ever want to be pregnant again. I am also not sure that I don't want to. I may truly not have sex again for a very very long time.

@babymay2016 you do realize that there are side effects to being snipped also? There are plenty of women who regret that decsion and its not so easy to go back. Think long and hard before making the decision is all im saying

@vvrobinson I am afraid if I choose any birth control and still get pregnant, that I would be faced with a decision I never want to make... I do not believe in abortion for myself but I do not want to endure this again. I am currently just not very stable I guess. I am unhappy and I wish to find a therapist and medication and really turn my life around. Be happy somehow. If that is possible though.. I don't want to not be able to have a baby. But if I do then would I just spiral down again? I don't know

@vvrobinson Yeah I know. I am thinking of it in all scenarios. I just really don't know 😥

@babymay2016 theres bc that is 99.999% active like the nexplanon. Ive had the first model and we had sex several times a day every day, never failed. If you deliver and get it right away before having sex again you have zero worries. The only time most bc like that fail is when the woman is already pregnant very early on and they don't detect it in the pee. I suggest taking to your ob they know who to send you to for help and support. You're not alone battling these feelings and your ob can help guide you the right way. And actually they can give you meds now to help your possible ppd

@vvrobinson Is that the one that goes in your arm? I am just so paranoid about all birth controls, the side effects, and it getting lodged somewhere else. I want to really get help with my depression and not feel crazy and not know if it's the bc, meds, or just me being crazy. Idk how to explain. I just want to feel "normal".

@vvrobinson I hope I am not being annoying and I really appreciate your advice. I am just struggling with this decision. I have never been on any meds but have serious depression. I am seeking help now to always be here for my two boys. I don't want to make the wrong decision and maybe get pregnant again and not want to be... or have to stop medication and spiral down again. I am having lots of different thoughts and have less than two weeks to decide! Crunch time

@babymay2016 i could read off the statistics to you but it wont help. You yourself will need to push past your fear to get things done the way they need to be. In my experience after going through labor i believe myself to have gone through the worst part and everything else in life cannot compare. Having have had my kids makes me feel really brave, for them and for myself. Im sorry, i really hope you find the help you need and can decide what you want to do about your bc method

@vvrobinson Thank you, you're right. I do hope I can pull through this and also feel brave at the end of it. I want to feel better for my kids.

@babymay2016 take care of yourself. Listen to your body and support your mental health as well as physical. Both play a key role in your overall health. Obviously you wont work out for awhile but taking evening strolls with the kids isnt a bad thing. Fresh air will do good to all. Take time to relax your mind too, whether its with a book or whatever.

Your a great mother!! Don’t doubt that!! I hope you feel better soon depression is the worse. Don’t decide on anything yet if you really want it done wait a couple months after baby is born and if you still feel that way then do it but make sure you are really sure.