Trigger. Lost baby

Went in for my 20 week check up and found out our son had passed away. Nothing was wrong, my pregnancy has been going great. I'm so numb right now. I'll he delivering him later this week. I don't want to do this. I don't want to do this. Not before Christmas. How am I'm going to tell my kids?? My dear sweet baby boy. Why did this happen?

So I thought I was starting my period. I woke up this morning with tiny cramps nothing major. I then had to use the bathroom and I was spotting. It has since went away and I hope it stay away. My last period was Dec. 28 and I should've came on Jan. 25th but nothing.

Yesterday I went out with my boyfriend went to watch a movie, me and him don't live together yet. but point is yesterday when he was dropping me off his like sleep over at my house witch the mom and dad lives. I said no,

his response was why is everyone deciding or making choices for you and their going to do the same with the baby, when I know that's not true. what he thinks is that my mom tells me not to sleep over. So he left all mad. and I felt in my heart that he went on and cheated on me...

Omg I need to vent something weird just happened.... I'm scared because I thought it would never happen. I was in a deep sleep dreaming about ice cream and then all of a sudden I'm feeling wet spots on my neck thinking my fiancé's cat was in the room so I brushed it off. What scared me was then I felt something between my legs not bothered by it. Then all of a sudden I wake up to a twinge in my vagina only to see my fiancé is fucking me in my sleep I wake and was like scared. So I don't say noth...

OK tmi but I'm hairy down there can't see nothing because my big belly I need to shave tho i think cause I'll be having this baby soon is it important to shave girls???