7/7/18 8:56am Penelope Violet Sloane Walker // woke up around 1am with contractions about 3-4 mins…

7/7/18 8:56am Penelope Violet Sloane Walker // woke up around 1am with contractions about 3-4 mins apart. Got to the hospital around 5am, already at 5cm, barely got my epidural and catheter and I knew I just HAD to push. The doctor wasn’t here yet so they begged me to wait, as she was putting her gloves, etc. on I said again I had to push. Pushed a handful of times and out she came. No tearing!! No stitches!! This epidural was different, while it worked I still had some feeling which was INTENSE for that ring of fire!!

We should’ve been discharged Sunday at 3pm. Unfortunately I’m having some PPD signs already so they kept us an extra night so I can consult social services and my actual OB. Which makes me even more emotional because I just wanna be home with my boys already. I’m scared they’ll try and take P. I know they only kept us because of my old self harm scars. So I’ve been crying nonstop because I hate my younger self, and because I want to go home.