K ladies, I need some help. A friend of mine needs advice. Colton is her fiancé and they just had a…

It's extremely unfair and wrong of her to expect his family to be involved and not want to establish paternity. I suggest he go to the courts and request a DNA test. She can't ignore it.

Question: was your friend and now fiancée together when he messed with her? Meaning did he cheat or did all this happen before they were together?

That’s what I also think.

@mojobebe, no, they’ve only been together a year. They’re supposed to get married next month. 😕

Well that was nice that her husband is stepping up to be the dad but that’s only because Colton didn’t know he had a son. If that child looks like Colton and I was his fiancée I would push for him to get a paternity test done quick! As in, before I walk down anybody’s aisle.

I would definitely file for a paternity through the court. Then she will be required to do it and he would be aloud to have right if he wanted them.

@tegandavis16, that’s what I told her. She hasn’t wrote back yet.

She said the woman’s husband signed the child’s birth certificate. So what would happen with Colton then? 😬

@messybunmom, if the paternity test is positive the birth certificate would be amended.

@glencoco, thank you! I was hoping it would be if that were the case if he’s the dad. This other lady just seems so shady on doing things.

I’m just finding all this out and it’s from a really close friend so I’m actually surprised she hasn’t spoke of it sooner. 😔

Considering how shady she is acting about it, I would just be prepared for her to try to take him for everything he’s got for child support if he follows through on the paternity test and it comes back positive. She may even threaten it as a way to sway him from doing it if she finds out he’s thinking about it before hand.

And if it’s positive and I were him, I’d absolutely file for more than just minimum visitation considering she’s kept this from him for 2+ years

Okay sooo, he found about the child a year ago. He told her about getting a dna test. She refused and they never heard from her again until today.

I’m not even sure what to think if he’s known this long without taking steps to be apart of a child’s life that could be his. But on the other hand, she could have changed her number and moved. Im not even sure if that would be the case lol. 😕🤔

I told her to get a court ordered dna test and go from there. I’m not butting in too much because it’s not my business. If she wants to tell me more then she can and I’ll give her advice but for now I’m just going to keep my mouth shut. 😓

@messybunmom, at this point I would give him the benefit of the doubt. Depending on the type of person she is he may have thought she was just talking crap and assumed she was lying when she turned down the dna test.

@tegandavis16, exactly.

If Colton’s family is messy have them do one of those DNA tests you can do at home next time they are around the child 😂.. I’m jkn, kinda lol. No he really needs to petition the court and get a DNA test if that is his child then your friends son has a brother he deserves to know and have a relationship with, some women are so messy and need to wake up and put their children first.

@mimixtmn, 😂 that was my first thought.

I’d show up to her husband and talk man to man about “our” son.

I’d tell my fiancé to get his shit together and take her to court. No way would I marry someone who wouldn’t fight for his “potential” child.

@laniejay, yup! I agree!

@spookylyn, that’s what I told her. She said “we will probably have to do that” 😕

Maybe I'm wrong, but...If your friend marries him and that turns out to be his kid, I think she then has to also be financially responsible if he has to start paying child support?

@oceanhalo, I’m honestly not sure how any of that works if she would be responsible for it as well or not.

@messybunmom I think I remember someone talking about it on BB a long time ago... The payments still have to come from him but I think they average in her income as well when looking at what his overall income is to calculate how much he has to pay every month. But maybe I'm wrong, like I said I just remember it vaguely from a post back in the day.

@oceanhalo, that would make sense. I don’t want her to screwed over money wise just because if the child is his then that would make 2 child supports for him. He already has another son from another woman, this new child plus theirs that she gave birth to last month. She also has a daughter from a previous relationship. She’s a teacher so her income is really slim. 😔

I think it depends on where you are located but yes usually the wife’s income would come into play as well which is why some people don’t legally get married. It would be their incomes combined then they will look at the children involved and the support payments would be based on that. I would def have paternity test before she marries him so she knows what she’s in for.

Wait was your friend also in the dark or she knew this girl approached Colton a year ago??

@mimixtmn, I told her that he should get the test first before they get married and go from there.

@phoebesmommy, I didn’t even ask that. I’m not sure. They’re moving quite fast for only being together a year. I don’t know him all that well.

@messybunmom, oh boy. Hopefully she slows down a bit before taking on his baggage and hopefully she knew

@phoebesmommy, my thoughts exactly!!

The money thing: my aunt married a guy who owed back child support and her income tax got garnished several years in a row to pay for it. Even though she had income tax from her job, they took it to pay for his child support.

@glencoco, yikes!! 😞

@messybunmom, just something for your friend to think about because once the paternity test is positive he may be forced to pay.

@glencoco, that’s what happened to one of my bil. Even though he had proof, receipts and money orders to prove that he was helping her and paying basically everything for his son, the judge didn’t care and he had almost 6k in back child support.

@phoebesmommy, she did know about it from a year ago. He told her when they started getting serious.