trying to keep it together.....

I got my full body scan done yesterday. After Being prodded with a needle 8 times because they couldn't find a vein. The nurse putting the iv in wasn't comfortable using my port for some odd reason. So I left went downstairs to my oncology doctor had them put the IV in my port came back upstairs to do the ct. Well the scan came back today. They found 3 spots on my lungs they are concerned about. So now waiting for the call to set up my biopsy of the lungs. I'm trying to hold it together and not lose my s*** . But when the doctor tells you to get in ASAP it's kind of hard to. I'm really scared. I'm home alone and don't really need to tell my mom over the phone. So she's coming by when she's off. I can't believe this is happening.