Mothers please read. I need advice
Mothers please read. I need advice
Well a little background on my situation... I have a two year old son. His biological father left me when I turned 16 weeks pregnant. He never came around or called until my son was 14 months old. The only reason he wanted to be involved was because he found out I was engaged. My son considers my husband his real father. It's killing me because before I got married, my husband wanted to adopt my son but then his biological father put himself on child support so he can have his rights. He has all his rights but yet never would see him. MY SON DOES NOT KNOW HIM! So we agreed he would see him as long as I was there. Now I've been brave and let my son go for a couple of hours alone. (2 hours was the longest and he brought him back fast because he didn't know what to do) I don't trust him with my son because he knows nothing about him. Now he's always threatening me he's just going to take him for a whole weekend. This kills me. I just want to protect my son but he has rights. He doesn't even have a home. He's always bouncing around and goes back with his "on again off again" girlfriend. I Wanted to get in touch with his girlfriend but it seems like he's hiding her. I just wanted to see who my son is going to be around and let her know about my son. Am I wrong for this? What should I do?
deleted-user·
No u are absolutely right. I would feel the same way. I would go to family court and tell them the situation and have them put restrictions on visitation. Then tell him once he has a proper home where your son can stay overnight is the only way u would consider it.
Cristina ·
Мама сына (2 года), беременна (4 нед.)
I've talked to a lawyer already about all this and apparently, it doesn't matter if he doesn't have a permanent home. Isn't that just crazy?! Our legal system is so messed up. And just the fact that he would want to fight me for joint custody, he could win it because the way they see it is, only "loving and caring" fathers would want joint custody. It's a bunch of rubbish. He's just trying to torture me and he knows this is the only way he can hurt me.
deleted-user·
Maybe it doesn't matter if he doesn't have a "permanent" home but it will matter that the home isn't fit for the child. I say get a different lawyers opinion. I feel u because i hate sending my daughter to her fathers. Everyone in house smokes. I actually have to remind him that he has to brush her teeth. Ugh! Where r u from?
Cristina ·
Мама сына (2 года), беременна (4 нед.)
I'm from south Texas . And he's a smoker too and I can't stand that! My son doesn't even like him and it hurts so much because my son is in the middle of this. He's still little and doesn't know any better but when he finds out later, it's going to crush him. I've seen my ex take care of his other children when they were babies and when we were together, I had to do everything for them. He wouldn't feed them or change them. I had to do all that and I'm scared my son won't be taken care of as well.
deleted-user·
Im from New York. Yea, i would def try to see what u can do with family court. A good lawyer will find some cause to ensure he doesn't have joint custody and limited visitation
Cristina ·
Мама сына (2 года), беременна (4 нед.)
Ya I'm going to need to look more into it. I'm pretty sure he's bluffing but if he ever does try then I'm really going to fight him against it.
deleted-user·
My ex pulled that crap, but only ever wanted to see her every couple years to show off to his girlfriends till I stopped allowing it.
My husband was still able to terminate his rights and adopt. So deff contact another lawyer.
Cristina ·
Мама сына (2 года), беременна (4 нед.)
I wish I could get his rights terminated! I feel my ex is doing it for show also. Did you have to have any evidence to get his rights terminated?
deleted-user·
My family went through a similar situation my nephew was in a wreck with his "father" and i use it very loosely, and he was under 1 at the time my sister wanted my nephew back but the "father" refused to give him back to use we had to involve the police and they told us legally he did not have to give my nephew back because he is the father and there was no custody agreement set up... So definitely arrange a custody agreement ASAP
Cristina ·
Мама сына (2 года), беременна (4 нед.)
Our whole legal system is so messed up. Babies belong with their moms. I mean, if it was an unfit mother than ok, go with the father. But these guys who I consider "sperm donors" need to just leave us alone. The kids are the ones who suffer being around these jerks. I'm definitely going to be talking to more lawyers and seeing if I have better options.
deleted-user·
I had my lawyer talk to him, and he agreed to sign off after being informed how it would go if he did not. However with a good lawyer you could get it done without the exs consent as well. Evidence helps, but often men like that simply open their mouths in court and incriminate themselves.