Why is she pregnant ?! Yesterday I went to my sisters apartment to drop a tv off I was giving them.…

Maybe it's not hers? Maybe she had a friend over the night before or something?

It may not be a planned pregnancy and she may be just as worried about it all as you are.

Tell her you are there for her if she needs to talk about it and try to offer her some emotional support. It might make things a tiny bit easier for her knowing she has somebody to open up to!

Maybe she didn't tell you because she was scared you would judge her...

Also, if she has basically just taken the test (she still had it on the back of the toilet) she probably wanted it to sink in for her first before telling anyone.

It was deff hers cause I asked her about it. My sister knows I would never judge her. I keep my opinions that would upset her to myself because I want us to be close. She told me she took the test before she went over to my parents house, we were both over there visiting my parents at the same time. I'm scared for her because she cannot financially support another child right now. I'm not sure how she will support this baby.

The way you come across to me now seems pretty judgemental. Anyway who is to say that she plans to keep the baby. It could also be possible that she is weighing all of her options before she decides when and if she tells people.

I've seen people make it with less and raise beautiful, happy and healthy children. They may have not had Jordan's and Nike's but they made it. And the day my Jordan's become a problem, I'd wear whatever to survive.

Maybe she didn't tell you BC you ARE judgmental.

A child is a beautiful blessings weather or not it is planned.

IMO you seemed upset she's pregnant along with you.

@rue- It's entirely possibly to live on one income... Why would a woman not be able to earn enough for her family but men do it all the time?!

OP- I hope your sister figures out how to support herself. Firstly, she needs to get WIC so she has extra food. Maybe your parents will be upset but not write her off. Try to be supportive but don't feel obligated to help her financially. Sounds like you're in a better situation than her.

It's understandable that you're concerned, you care about her and her future. Unfortunately, she is an adult and no matter how much you don't approve of her having another child, it was her decision and she is. All you should be doing this point is emotionally supporting her because she is probably more scared than you are.

I asked her if she planned to keep the baby and she said she was without a doubt. Im happy for her that she has made that decision and that I will have another niece or nephew. My sister is a medical assistant making next to no money doing so. Her boyfriend has not worked and she struggles because she gives him money for his weed and beer. He finds excuses to quit jobs as soon as he get them. He has spent more time in jail than he has held a job for the 8 years I've known him. Thats why she can't afford another child. I told her to look into wic again, they told her she didn't qualify for it when she did her renewal for my nephew, but with another child on the way I believe she would qualify now. I wouldn't ever right my sister off even if my parents did. Though her and I aren't as close as we use to be she is my go to person when I have issues and I want her to be able to come to me when she has issues. I'm not upset that we are pregnant at the same time. It was amazing to have someone so close to me going threw everything I was when we were pregnant together the first time. I don't dislike her boyfriend. He is a nice person who has made mistakes in his life like everyone else, I just don't agree with my sister having to work overtime every week to make ends meet to support his bad habits.

Edit: I do not think this pregnancy was planned what so ever, I don't believe my sister would put her self in that situation knowing it would make her struggle even more than she has been. I'm not trying to sound judgmental, sorry if it came off that way. I'm scared for her. I'm scared that my parents will not talk to her anymore (it's their way or no way) I'm scared that she is going to struggle to support her family. I don't like to see my sister in tough situations because I care.

Maybe u shouldn't judge her. And how do u know she can't afford her bills. Almost everyone has trouble with bills doesn't mean they shouldn't have kids.

@armywife because she has lived in 3 different apartments in a year because she can't afford the rent, she has had to come stay with me because her national grid has been shut off on more than one occasion. That's how I know she can't afford her bills

It's unfortunate she's going through this. Thankfully she has you to emotionally support her. Too bad there's nothing you can really do about her deadbeat dh. Hopefully she'll realize what a deadweight he is and make him be responsible or just kick him to the curb.

I wouldn't say anything and just wait until your sister brings it up. Because as morbid as this sounds, maybe she won't keep the pregnancy or the baby, and you approaching her might just make things worse. Over all though, it's her life, and even if she's making bad choices, they are her bad choices to make.

@park unfortunately after 8 years with him and him having a son from a previous relationship before they met that he doesn't take care of, I don't think she will leave him. He owes a lot of money to the other mother of his child in back support. Hopefully with him having a 3rd kid on the way he will get his act together for the sake of the children.

@dark she knows I know, I was stunned when I saw the test and asked her about it. If I can help her in any way possible I will. I know she will somehow find a way to figure it out to support another child. She immediately told my nephew that she is pregnant cause he told me auntie and mommy have babies in there bellies. He is only 4 and tells all to anyone so it won't be long before my parents find out because I foresee him telling them.

Maybe she didn't tell you because 1. she just tested 2. She was worried you would judge her based in her financial situation (surprise you are). And you don't keep her business to yourself. You bring it to a forum for other women to possibly judge her. This isn't being supportive.

@mama I'm not judging her. If you read in the comments you would see that I'm concerned for her. I doubt my sister would care what a bunch of random women that she has never met has to say.

Really random but me and my sister always get pregnant at the same time the 1st we were but I had a miscarriage. The second was with my DD and she was 6 weeks after me and now haha. We're having girls... She's having twins tho... Crazy stuff

I love being pregnant with her! It was awesome going threw all the stages of pregnancy together with our firsts. We are way further apart this pregnancy then we were with the first.

Well I hope it works out for her. I'm sure she will figure it out but it sucks because of the what ifs...

I hope it does also. All I can do is be there for her, which I'm more than happy doing. My nephew has been asking for a baby brother for a while now! He might get his wish! (I'm secretly hoping she has a girl)

Maybe she didn't want to tell you because you seem to be judging her a little. You can't make the decisions for her and you need to let her be happy and act as a guide, not a parent. You don't have to agree with her, but as her sister you should be supportive.

Omg. People. Op. Wasn't judging her sister. That word is so annoying on here. We all judge every second of the day. She is worried for her sister. We would all feel the same way if our sisters were in the same place.

Although your concern is valid, it's not your life. If she's happy then let her figure it out & be there for her emotionally if she needs you.

It didn't come across to me as OP judging, just being concerned with how her mother will react , and other things. Of course she is upset her sister didn't tell her, I would be too.

Just be as supportive as you possible can, but I totally get where you are coming from.

Thank you ladies!!!! I wasn't judging her at all. And neither of my pregnancies were planned either. I was 19 when I had my first. I will support her in whatever decision she makes in her life even if I don't agree with it. As she does for me.

You sound a bit ridiculous.. What do you mean your hurt she didn't tell you? If it was on the back of the toilet chances are she has only very recently found out.. I don't know about you but my I don't run around telling people sister or not as soon as I piss on the stick and see double lines.. That is something kept between my so and I in the beginning.. She doesn't owe you anything.. Not to mention it's her pregnancy and her problem you have no right to have "issues" with her being pregnant that's probably why she didn't tell you

@ mini funny cause she told me the moment she found out she was pregnant with my nephew. AGAIN if you read my previous comments I'm concerned on how she is going to support this baby plus her previous kid when her boyfriend doesn't do a single thing to contribute! I think you sound a bit ridiculous because you don't know how close me and my sister are.

you don't sound like you're being judgmental at all. you just seem like a concerned sister. I would be concerned if my sister was pregnant and already had a child to support along with a boyfriend who doesn't work. maybe talk to her about how you feel. make sure you tell her you're just concerned about your future niece or nephew's life.