Ladies.. This is very long but I need to vent, I am really stressed out and I'm turning to you guys.…
Ladies..
This is very long but I need to vent, I am really stressed out and I'm turning to you guys. Things with my SO are BAD! We have been fine for the past 2 weeks all cuddly and happy for our baby. 2 days ago he was acting distant and just not himself I asked him what's wrong and he said he's tired of me and wants to be done. He doesn't want to be with me and he's only with me because of our baby. He judges me because he's not my first! I mean this has always bothered him but he's never been so mean about it. But technically he is my first because the guy that he thinks I did it with never put it in or cummed inside of me. I have been telling him over and over and now he's judging me and says I'm a h*e and pathetic. I honestly can't even enjoy the last few days of my pregnancy because all these negative thoughts are always on my mind. He says I'll never be special to him because I was young and stupid and not even in love. I just wish he would understand I regret it and wish I could take it back!! :( I cry at night I cry before work because I'm just so hurt that the whole time we've been together (2 years and a half) none of that seemed to bother him at all until now!! :'(
deleted-user·
How old is he again?? He seems young & foolish. Sorry that you have to put up with his b.s but f*** him even if you got feelings for him but you should worry more for your child and don't put that stress on baby when baby is here (or in your tummy lol) Your SO needs to grow up and realize that even if he were or not your first.. It shouldn't matter AT ALL like my SO is my second and idk how many he has been with but Idc because at the long run we're together because we love each other & the past is the past for a reason.. Ugh I hate little guys like that.. Sorry if I am calling him immature & stupid but he is. Mama you don't need this right now or this foolishness in your life. You needs support & someone who loves you & doesn't bring you down.
deleted-user·
I'm sorry you're going through this. It sounds like he's making excuses. If he had a problem then he should have said something before now, I highly doubt it's taken 2 1/2 years for him to realise he has a problem with it. Maybe someone said something to him that made him think of it? I hope you get this sorted either way.
deleted-user·
Anything before him is none of his business. Why are you putting up with any of it. "My past is MY business hit the road". That's the only thing that should be said. Screw him
deleted-user·
You have absolutely nothing to apologise for. How dare he.
He must think he is perfection personified.
deleted-user·
What a douche! Seriously who pulls this right before a woman is due with their child.
I'm really sorry your going thru this. Hopefully he's just having a moment of extreme anxiety or something as the birth is getting so close, still no excuse.
deleted-user·
Are you guys very young? I ask because this kind of thing just doesn't matter in the long run, I promise! I hope he can grow up and be nice to you and realize this isn't 1950!
I've been with my husband since I was 17, 1997! Even then, we were not each other's 'first' but that's a none issue in a long term relationship/ marriage!
All that matters is your love for each other and your baby!! Hang in there!
deleted-user·
Wow! He needs to get a grip and stop behaving like a jerk. I understand that some people wait until marriage, and this is important to them. However, that is no longer the majority nor the status quo. What happened before you met your spouse is irrelevantly. All that matters is the present and your future together, which he seems to be ruining.
deleted-user·
The first one doesnt really matter is the last one on our life who matters the most!
Janet·
Thank you ladies so much! You're all right! Things like that shouldn't matter to him if he's sure he wants to be with me for the long run! He is 21 and I am 19 so yeah sorta young. I will go home after work and talk to him and reassure him the past isn't what's important it's the future that's important and how we gotta make the best out of that.
deleted-user·
Dang he's not the far away from me.. I'm 23 & my SO is 22 ? & we ate differently towards this plus we come from very religious views idk but he needs to grow up & man up.
Janet·
Yes I know. Talking to him tonight was a fail. He didn't want to hear it so I just left him alone.
deleted-user·
Woooow, Hate men like that, and come on, what year are we on, that shouldn't be an issue, well if he doesn't like it then fine, he can go find himself a never touched woman, lets see if he finds it. Why do they think that only they can have different encounters with different women before they find the right one. He may be the father of your unborn baby but you don't have to stick with him, who does he think he is? The last man on earth? ..... Sorry, it just makes me angry, hope everything turns out for the best, some people change and some don't, hope he comes around. I wish you lots of happiness always with your head up and proud of yourself.
Janet·
@gina yes I know! It doesn't matter how many he's been with he wanted to be my first. Thanks for your kind words I hope things change for the better.