communication I feel so distant between me nd my husband. I am towards the end of my 2nd pregnancy…
communication
I feel so distant between me nd my husband. I am towards the end of my 2nd pregnancy and we dont have anything ready. We still need so much and. Everytime he gets paid i hope that he will get a descent check and never happens and im loosing hope. I never ask for anything for me. My purse is falling apart i dont have money to get makeup ive been needing. And for 5 years my husband has just said happy birthday to me. But has never auctually done anything for me. Just once i wanted and needed something for me. He is bipolar so when he is not being mean and having an episode. Its always been about him and my son. Just at this point where i feel like it will never be about me. I just want to feel loved. I try to explain it yesterday to him but just left us further apart. I am not at all materalistic. I just want to feel important. Maybe thats asking to much.
deleted-user·
It's not asking for to much. I completely understand how you feel.. I've been there. I got so sick and depressed about constantly repeating myself over and over that I eventually gave my husband a wake up call. I packed all my s*** and left. It was the hardest thing I've ever done. He was grabbing my arms and on his knees begging me not to go.. I had to rip his hands off of me. I could hardly see because I was crying so hard but I left. I couldn't feel the way I felt for another mintue. I couldn't repeat myself or reword what I was trying to say to make someone who wasn't really ever listening hear me for another second. Not ever feeling loved or appreciatied was killing me.. Now, without a doubt I know by breaking both of our hearts that day... It saved us. It took 6months until I went back home. I wanted to make sure the effert and his words werent all talk or for show. Now 3 years later my husband truly makes me feel so blessed to be his wife. He helps me clean without asking, We don't have much money but him making a candle lit dinner with boxed hamburger helper means so much...him coming in the door and kissing me on the forehead and asking what he can do to help or picking me up a purse from a garage sale because mine was falling apart.. It's the thought that counts. Him saying thank you for putting away his laundry or helping with our daughter without me feeling like I'm nagging. Means so much and if i could go back.. I'd do it all over. The only thing I would change is how long it took me to leave. I hope the best for you. Just know... What your asking isn't to much. You deserve it and so much more. If you ever need anyone to talk to.. You can always message me. ?
deleted-user·
My husband is also bipolar and goes through ups and downs of being depressed. Hes learned to cope with it in different ways other than taking everything out on me (like he used to)
Gabriela'smama·
Livdanielle what you said truly means so much. I could tell our situations are def similar. Maybe, i need to set him a wake up call. Theres times where he will push me away and tell me to leave than.but i never do .because he will be like i really dont want you to go. just maybe he needs the realization. You said he has changed because u walked out. Was there anything else u did? Or was it the fact that he realized he does count on you? I get 100 percent what ur saying with just the smallest things matter. Like even saying thank you or getting a cheap bag i would be estatic at this point. Just the fact of having a bag. Its at the point where a grocery bag would look better. Just a gesture to show hey i love you and i care. Im very happy to hear that everything has turned around for you. Im glad u didnt settle for less than you deserve.(:
Gabriela'smama·
Does he happen to be on meds? My husband is in the middle of changing his meds again. Because last one was not working. Which is hard . im not saying its not hard on them. But everytime they go through a change in meds its extremely difficult. More mood swings, name calling that he doesnt mean. And depression.