Would you? (Trigger warning)

i think you should go for it. he needs to pay the price for the pain he has caused you. and obviously if you do get some of those comments like you mentioned you just need to remember that you are strong and like you said your story has helped others. this might help some people too who are afraid to reach out and report similar situations and anyone who makes those kinds of comments to you are not people worth having in your life.

Thank you for responding. I've been going back and forth on this for awhile now. I just don't want to try if people are going to say those things. But he has gotten away with so many things (so far) and it's just not fair.

I think of you feel you need to press charges in order to move forward and heal then you absolutely should. Might also prevent him from abusing someone else. Just keep in mind the road you will face going forward. Make sure you have a good support system and that you are with a therapist that specializes in this type of trauma. Talk to the police and see if you can even go forward with the case because it has been years(?) and there are statutes in different states. It's going to be an up hill battle but I'm sure you will come stronger on the other side for it.

People may say comments like that im not sure why they would but some people are just awful, just remember that what you are doing is for the good of you and possibly other people that are being harmed. The comments should mean less then nothing to you because you KNOW they are wrong and honestly it sounds like you have a great SO who cares for you deeply and will stand by your side through this rough time.

I'm in Az. As far as I know there is not statue to limits here.

Here's what it says "No Statute of limitations for rape or sexual assault."

"No DNA exemption to Statute of limitations"

I just know he's been on the run for years. He gets away with far too much. And I want him to take responsibility for this and so many other things. He cannot keep running.

Realistically yes, people will say those things. But I do think he needs to be held accountable. I was raped and never reported it because I was underage and really intoxicated and I didn’t think anyone would believe me, and I regret it a lot.

Thank you ladies for your kind words. The worst part is when I'm having the dreams I know I'm dreaming but I cannot wake myself up. It's like I'm being forced to relive it almost every night. I will definitely see what my Options are through therapy. I just want to find peace. And I want that scum to be held accountable.

Unfortunately it's going to be a she said he said case. And if they do decide to charge him and you go to trial make sure you are prepared for what that entails. It won't be an easy road at all and will almost be like being victimized all over again. But that in itself can be therapeutic to some people. Even if the outcome isn't what you hope for. At least you stood up and said this happened to me and it's not ok. No matter what you decide definitely follow through with the therapy and maybe even look into some support groups for woman who have gone through the same thing you have. I wish you the best of luck and pray that you will find whatever you need to heal and move past this

I think if it will help you heal then you should. But like others said, make sure you have a good support team and a good therapist. I had someone charged for sexual assault and honestly i regretted it for a long time and I don't know if I could do it again. I was a victim all over again. The law is supposed to be there to protect us and it didn't do a very good job protecting me. I wish you the best of luck!

I think you should go to therapy before because even pressing charges there's a chance you may not get the outcome you want which can come back on you mentally meaning how would you feel? Would it make you feel worse after or does it give you some closure this would be something you have to be strong with and I pray everything works out for the best because no one should have to go through that

I don't think you should press charges but definitly stick with therapy and if after therapy you still want to press charges than do it. Good luck.

If it were me I probably wouldn't just because after all this time I wouldn't want to sit in front of him and relive every detail in front of him and strangers in court. If you emotionally can handle the court and seeing him and telling it all again then go for it!

The choice is yours but even when it's fresh a rape case is hard to get to court. It's probably the only crime the victim has to prove happened. It's hard to deal with

Thank you ladies. Yes therapy is number one. I just thought things were getting better. So if I were to pursue these charges and he doesn't show up what would happen? He has two warrants in Texas 1. For contempt of court? And 2. Serious bodily injury with vehicle. (Hit n run) could this be the beginning of him getting caught for those? When we were getting a divorce he wouldn't give me an address because he doesn't want me turning him in but I have a mutual friend with him who has his address. I have spoken to the cops and they've done nothing.

Yes! If he’s ruined your life absolutely he deserves his life to be ruined he shouldn’t get away with treating women like that.

Truthfully it's unlikely that this will have any impact on the warrants. Take this as far as you need to just be go in with your eyes open that it's going to be hard. The most you may get is a report filed.

Well thank you ladies. I really appreciate it. I will most definitely focus on therapy and work from there. ❣️

I say go for it but my only concern is that nothing happens to him how would that effect you? Would it make how you are feeling worse?

Honestly I thinking getting my story out there would be healing for me regardless of him getting in trouble. I just want to work on the process of him possibly getting caught (even if it's unlikely)

I don’t really have advice only encouragement. I’m so sorry you had to go through that. I hope therapy helps you and whatever direction you take helps you find closure. I’m glad you have a loving husband who is there for you now.