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A vent from the heart.. My mom has been sick for a while. No dr would actually get to the bottom of…

A vent from the heart..

My mom has been sick for a while. No dr would actually get to the bottom of it till the last time which was the day before thanksgiving. She got admitted to the hospital and we found out she has neuroendocrine tumors (cancer) all over her organs. So the last month if my pregnancy was really hard for me watching my mom go thru this and my emotions and spending the holidays with her in the hospital was not easy!! Needless to say they sent her to MD Anderson's in Houston for chemo. It went well so she was sent home to follow up with a doctor in her city. It was so emotionally draining from just having a baby and watching my mom lose her hair and seeing her (slightly getting better) still sick. She lost all her color and so much weight! The other day we went to American cancer society to get her fitted for wigs since my cousin shaved her head that morning. When she took her hat off her head which was the first time I seen her completely bald I was about to lose it in that place! It hit hard for me and reality sunk in... She no longer looked like my mom and my heart was completely broken for her and how she must feel without her hair. I mean our hair to us women is important. Now I every time I think about her that picture of her pulling off her hat pops up in my head and I just start crying my eyes out!! She's getting better but never would I thought that this was going to be my moms health for a long time. She's had this illness for a while and she never knew. We lost my grandma to pancreatic cancer when I was 16. I don't know why but I always deny things like this like it's just not happening. My grandma knew she had it and kept it from us till she just got too weak. She was an oncology nurse and kept working till about 3-4 months from her death. I regret not talking to my grandma more when she was sick and telling her I love her! I spent almost everyday with her my entire life. My grandma and I were super close I had the coolest grandma in the world! Well I just feel like I'm doing the same thing with my mom that I was doing with my grandma.. But I do go see my mom almost everyday and help her out like getting groceries doing her nails cleaning the house for her. I just can't get myself to ask about her health unless she tells me something about it. It's like I try to avoid that conversation. I want my mom back! Even her voice has changed... Also my dad is dying and my brother has no idea.. His kidneys are shutting down and he was supposed to start dialysis at the end of November but didn't because of my mom.. So now he has to go on a transplant list. He's at a 4 and I heard basically when the kidneys get to a 5 u will die (not sure).. Just 8 months ago his kidneys were at a 3.4 so it's progressing quickly. They don't want to tell my brother about how bad my dad is doing cuz he's a senior in high school and they don't want to stress him out even more. I just cry and cry! Just want to thank you if u have read this whole thing of letting my emotions run wild and say CANCER REALLY DOES SUCK AND DIABETES!!! :-)

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Комментарии

babybump_user

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I'm so sorry. :( this breaks my heart. Both of your parents sound like wonderful people. I couldn't imagine. Stay strong for them.

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babybump_user

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Wow I'm so sorry this breaks my heart .. I will pray for I lost my mom to a heart attack all disease n sickness SUCK! stay strong mama ?

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babybump_user

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Thank you ladies! I really appreciate it!!!! U have no idea! I couldn't imagine losing my mom! :-( I'm sry!!

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babybump_user

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I'm so sorry you are going through all of this! Just being there with your mom, I think she knows that you are trying to be there for her even if you don't talk about her sickness. No one wants to lose their mother or father so it's natural what you are feeling! *hugs from California!

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babybump_user

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Thank you Alexis! :-)

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babybump_user

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I'm sorry chelsee. I lost my grandpa to cancer. IT REALLY SUCKS. To give you positive vibes, my mums best friend beat the cancer 2 times. I think you do everything right. My mum's friend said that she didn't give up because we didn't pity her. We kicked her in her ass and this made her strong. Be there for your mum, listen when she has a breakdown and encourage her. She knows you are always there for.her. You a such a lovely daughter... I will pray for your parents

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babybump_user

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Mack thank you for your kind words.. All I can do is be strong and be the there for her! :-)

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babybump_user

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Yes darling Cancer and Diabetes both suck. I I'm so sorry you going through this because i went through the same thing with my father going through kidney failure and my mother having a stroke both due to diabetes.

Thats all the more reason why ppl like u and I must take care of ourselves. Hang in there sweetness and be strong for ur mother and father because they need ur strength.

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babybump_user

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Thank you sweet!

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babybump_user

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Positive thoughts and prayers for you and mom

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babybump_user

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Thanks momma!

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babybump_user

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Stay strong! Send prayers to you and your family. I lost my grandfather to cancer and I didn't know that he had cancer until it cams back. Just remember God will never put more on you than you can handle.

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babybump_user

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@dsc seems like he's really pushing it! Lol I know and thank you! :-)

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babybump_user

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I'm so sorry your going through all this.. I will be praying for your family.. Hang in there

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babybump_user

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Thanks Erica! :-)

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babybump_user

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I'm so sorry:( I'm all teary eyed now. I'm praying for your mama. I can't imagine what the two of you have gone through. That's gotta be tough?

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babybump_user

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Your story makes me cry. Truly sorry you're going through this. I can't imagine how much pain you're going through. My best wishes to you and pray that you keep getting strength to get through this.

Soooo sorry OP!

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babybump_user

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So sorry you are going through all of this right now sweetie! Hang in there, you're such a strong woman between taking care of a new baby, and helping your parents best you can, I admire you! If you need, message me any time!

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babybump_user

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This is a lot for one persons plate. God must be working on a profound plan for your family. I am so sorry and my heart aches for you. Cancer has ravaged my moms entire side of family, including her. If you don't or can't talk about it with your mom, it's okay. All she needs is your love. ❤️

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babybump_user

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Im so sorry that is happening to you but spend alot of time with your mom right now. Its the best thing you can do. Also with your dad. It isnt easy but at least youll spend every moment you can with them in case of anything & y5oy wont be in regret.

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babybump_user

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Thank you so much ladies!!! It's been rough but I know we will get thru it together. I see it as I'm her rock and she's mine with how positive she has been :-)

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babybump_user

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I am so sorry. I couldn't imagine. Praying for you and your family.

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babybump_user

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I'm saying a huge prayer for your family. I lost my aunt last year to lung cancer, one of my very best friends the end of 2013 to Breast cancer. I named my daughter after her in remembrance so I feel your pain on seeing that person change forever from their battle.

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