@tacos4lyfe, thank you! Hopefully something will be done.

You can always call cPs and ask if it is “reportable” as in tell them your concerns and if they think it’s worth a case they will ask the info they need. I’ve had to do this several times as a social worker. Children witnessing physical abuse on an adult is reportable even if they themselves aren’t being abused

@whatheshell, perhaps you can let them in on what’s going on so then you and your family don’t get the blame. Be creative about it

@laniejay, thank you for the suggestions. I know last year they were on the verge of reporting her.

@whatheshell, schools are mandated reporters- if they were to get wind of the home situation... perhaps they’d be the one to call. Start documenting everything before the call is made.

No, we haven’t documented though we really should. I would think they would, which would either be me or my parents. Idk that my mom could handle having both on a full time basis so I would be happy to take the kids and care for them, they deserve so much more in life. It’s been like this ever since my nephew was born. I had him during the day and my mom had him at night. Then she got pregnant by the idiot again and brought my poor niece into this world who has a serious issue with men. I don’t think he has ever physically hurt her but I think a lot of neglecting and yelling. He has a cocaine problem but since they don’t live in the same house I’m sure CPS won’t do anything in regards to my sisters horrible parenting.

@whatheshell, I’m so sorry, it’s hard to watch people in this position. The kids don’t deserve this. Wouldn’t Cps place the children w closest relatives,? Do you and your parents document how much you care for the children? Bc I feel like Cps should be willing to work with you all until mom is stable enough to provide a better living situation

Definitely worth asking her. Though I’m not sure that she would allow it. My mom hinted to her that she should just give us her son. My sister wasn’t thrilled when that happened. That was when he was about 9 months old.

This is so sad! I’m sorry you’re put in this position. But you gotta be the poor kids advocate. I’d honestly ask my sister if I can just have her kids live with me to keep them safe. May work, may not.

@phoebesmommy, emotional yes, physically not that I’m aware of. His physical abuse toward the mom is always in front of the children. Last time he was choking her with the baby in her arms.

@phoebesmommy, that’s what I thought, I just don’t want her taking the kids from us, cause my parents and I are the ones who take care of them. Last year she was in jeopardy of having CPS called by the school cause he missed so much for no reason. This year he gets to school everyday cause i made sure I’m to my parents house to get him on the bus.
I will make the call. Hopefully someone on the outside can get through to her.

Has the SO ever been abusive to the children?

@whatheshell, it sounds like a call is in order. Sometimes we have to do the hard things and the person unwilling to make better decisions has to suffer. Having her children safe is worth the risk of losing a relationship IMO

We have tried. I took her and her son in for 2 months about 4 years ago. My parents let her move in to get away from him and to get back on her feet. It worked for 4 months, then she went back to him. She has chosen him over the kids so many times. I don’t think she is ready to let go of him.

Said person lives with my parents. CPS unfortunately is not involved. We have all repeatedly told her it’s not good for the kids, they don’t deserve that. I try to take them as often as I can because I hate the situation they are in but she doesn’t seem to care.

@whatheshell, in that situation likely cps is already involved. I know where I am if there is any police involvement where children are in the home cps is notified right away.

@whatheshell, do you have a friend who would be willing to call for you?

@laniejay, unfortunately given some of the reasons I would call she would know it’s me or my family members.

@whatheshell, you can call anonymously

I know someone who has 2 kids. One is school age and one is almost 2. She has them out until almost mid night on a school night, her boyfriend is abusive to her (he is the kids father) and has had the cops called on him in regards to the physical abuse and was going to go to jail but she wouldn’t show to court. And she is verbally abusive to the kids. I feel like if I call and they don’t do anything she is going to withhold the kids from me and my family, and right now we make sure the kids are okay given the circumstances

Why don’t you describe the situation @whatheshell? It may help w receiving better input

If you feel there is something going on that jeopardizes the safety and emotional well-being of the children, call. CPS is helpful in some areas. They are underfunded and staffed so they do have their shortfalls, but they do good things. Sometimes it’s just providing parents with the resources they need. I’d rather call and find out it isn’t necessary or things are not what they seem than risk a child being harmed.

Good reason, if you feel the children are in danger. The chances something will be done depend on a few things one being where you live and how serious cps there takes things and how bad the situation is. I know where I am if the children aren’t in immediate danger they do try and help the parents get their shit together so the kids don’t need to be removed.

If I knew they were doing drugs in the home, other than pot. Child abuse, not feeding them, not having what they need for the children, not taking care of them. Shit like that.

I think by law they have to send someone to check out the situation.