Tried to post this in our Facebook group but I can’t make post for some reason. When did you guys know you were done…

I feel the same way sometimes. My second daughter is 4 months now and I think it's getting a little easier. I also had ppd with both. I think every day about whether we should have one more or close up shop now. I don't have any real advice, just know you're not the only one who feels that way

For me I just knew I wasn’t done. Maybe because I had 2 boys and always dreamed of a daughter. Def tying my tubes after this one though. 🙊

@janeljade1985, my mom keeps telling me don’t make permanent decisions on temporary feelings but I’m like these temporary feeling suck and I don’t wanna feel them again lol. Thank you.

@cams, that’s where my struggle is. I’d LOVE a daughter, because my moms best friend and I just don’t know if a mother and son can have the same kind of friendship but I’m so torn.

For me I knew I was done after 2. My dh and I discussed it before even having kids. Just like cams I have 2 boys. I’ve always wanted a girl but wasn’t really willing to take that chance. I knew 2 was all I could handle and sometimes I can’t handle even them!! What’s his pedi and your dr say about your PPD? And his tongue tie? Don’t feel guilty you’re doing the best u can right now!! It’s hard I know cause our boys are close in age. Well the age difference I should say. Those first few months were so tough, but I promise u it will get better and a little,don’t wanna day easier, but a little easier and different. Hang in there momma you’re doing a great job with your little boys

I knew 100% I was done after the first one. Still haven't done anything permanent, just got an IUD.

@ss3mom, see when me and my husband imagined our family we were both like 4 kids minimum. I always wanted a big family. And then after we had our oldest we were like hmm maybe we are just happy with him. And then I got pregnant by surprise and were happy about it. I haven’t talked to a doctor for a while about the PPD because it has gotten a lot better we had ethans tongue tie revised when he was 10 days old. But it reattached and we just had it done AGAIN last week. And I have to do the stretches every few hours which is awful because it hurts him because I’m basically reopening the wound over and over. So that’s made my PPD and PPA a lot worse. It’s caused him to have severe reflux, issues eating even on a bottle so it’s just so stressful. And it’s genetic so there’s a huge chance our next baby would have the same problem and it’s just a pain. Thank you Leann ❤️

I feel the same way right now. My husband wants more kids but we already have two boys. I don't think anyone knows how much it takes out of you having kids until you have them. As much as I love my babies I think I'm done. I would wait on doing anything permanent though. You may feel different down the road

I was done after my 1st. My ex husband and I were happy with just one. Then we divorced. My now husband was 34 with no kids when we married. He wanted kids of his own so I agreed. After we had ds2 he wanted a girl. So we ended up having ds3. Now I know I’m DONE. They were preemies and my heart can’t take anymore. But, even if they weren’t, my NERVES can’t take anymore! I’m exhausted. I hate being pregnant. I love my kids more than anything. But I miss ME. I have completely lost myself in being a SAHM. So I’m done.

I had 3 boys ages 10, 7, & 4. Got pregnant again with a boy and miscarried at 14 weeks. Tried one more time and got our girl 😍 so I got my tubes tied with my 4th csection. The surgeries were a lot on my body and I have severe uterine windows

@redheadedmonster, I actually feel the same way, when my boys are school age I’m definitely gonna need to work or go to school.

@theirmommie, I had c sections too, that’s another reason for me. C sections really suck! Congrats on your girl :)

@biscuitsngravy.pls, awe that’s a sin. Poor little guy. I couldn’t imagine having to pull on his little tongue like that. I can understand how that changes everything. Maybe u Should talk with your dr. Maybe they can help in some way. Ya know u don’t have to be done right now and u don’t have to make a decision right now either. Whatever u two choose I wish u the best of luck. And good luck with the tongue tie!! Poor little fellow!! Just try to make sure u take some time for yourself!! It’s so important

I kinda feel like parenting is one of those things we think will be way easier than it is. And then you’re in it. No one could attempt to explain the sacrifices that would come or how they sometimes make us feel.

My advice is not to make any long term decisions for at least the first 16mos postpartum.

It’s so super hard when they’re little and it’s so super hard being relied on and needed 24/7. But you’ll never get the snuggles back or the sparkly eyes full of wonder and excitement once they’re grown.

When things are super rough for me mentally and I’m exasperated and someone needs me more than I think I can give I try to remind myself to just give in to the hard. Meaning.. like pain, if we tense up when we know something will hurt- it ALWAYS hurts more. But if we accept it, I find the pain isn’t as intense. One way I “give in to the hard” is by accepting that YES this is hard, YES I am exhausted, YES I feel have nothing left... BUT this is not forever, so let me just focus on the next thing and stop worrying about if I will have what it takes when it comes to future needs.

💗 hang in there mama. You JUST had a baby and I’m sure you’re doing so much more wonderfully than you realize

@phoebesmommy, you always know what to say. You’re makin’ me ball like a baby 😭 you’re SO right. I try to remember there will never be these “ firsts” again, the baby just laughed for the first time the other day. Those are the kind of things that make this crazy life worth living.

@biscuitsngravy.pls, too bad I can’t bring over some fluffernutters and shoot the breeze. This is my way of doing that😂

Guuuuurl have you ever been to shop rite in Akron!!?!

I knew I was done after my first one started kindergarten. I realized school lunches would kill us with 3 and I wouldn't be able to give them the opportunities I would want to.

@phoebesmommy, duuude Rita’s had a fluffernutter Italian ice yesterday 😩❤️ it was heaven. I haven’t!! But Akron isn’t far away!

@biscuitsngravy.pls, lol I’m gonna have to tell DH

If you ever make it over to Akron go to Shoprite on Main and get a cream filled donut😱🤤🤤🤤🤤

I always wanted two, a boy and a girl. After having my girl i tried everything I could to get a boy 😂 ttc close to ovulation, chinese calender thing (cant remember what its called) etc and I got a boy! I dont know if we would have tried for a third if we had a second girl 🤔 I hated pregnancy though (but love the end result 😍)so I am so grateful to stop at two.

My hormones or emotions or whatever it is want one more and sometimes I let myself think about it. My partner would kind of too but we don’t discuss it.

Because we both know that in reality we don’t have the room; the finances are ok but would be less ok; I’m bloody tired 😅;and both births I’ve had have ended up in surgery one way or another. Plus I’m getting older.

So my ‘heart’ says yes, my head says no.

For us we decided before having our second. Now DH won't book his vasectomy so 🤔 I sense there is something on his mind. He struggles with depression and has for a while. We planned to have two boys because his family basically only produces boys. But our second was a girl. So we broke that tradition.

As for your feelings about having enough patience and not feeling good enough for your littles. You are enough. We are all not perfect parents. We all loss our cool and get frustrated. If you're getting treatment for Postpartum depression, great. If not, please do. I speak as a person who has been told I'm many high stress situations that I have incredible patience. And this is true. I do. But even then some days my toddler drives me crazy. He does it to test me and I know that. It still doesn't make it easier to deal with. Especially when you factor in lack of sleep or when I don't get any support.

Hugs for you mama. You are doing the best you can. Parenting is a marathon. One we don't get any training in. We learn as we go. Through the tears, the pain, and love; we create Life, raise it, and send it out into the world. Be easy on yourself.

Just like there is no perfect time to have kids, you never know for sure when you should stop. Just know that there is still lots of time to decide.