Married ladies !! I have a question not sure if I should share this or not but I will anyways. My…
Married ladies !! I have a question not sure if I should share this or not but I will anyways. My fiance and I been engaged for 1 year he's pushing to get married and I'm pushing to hold off. We have had quite a rocky relationship and his debt that now will become mine actually frightens me. I've worked really hard my whole youth to build my credit a pay debt ...etc but that's one of the biggest reasons I don't want to get married. As anyone else every felt this way. On top of the fact marriage is a huge commitment for me which he thinks I making it bigger than what it is. What's your opinion?
A.B.·
Мама двоих (1 год, 8 лет)
It doesn't sound like you're ready. My husband and I got married when I had nothing. No credit, no car, no job at the time. He helped me get all that. He's the reason I have good credit now. When you 2 are married, you will have separate credit scores, so no worries about that. I think it goes deeper than the credit score though. I'm not sure you're ready to get married yet. I don't know if it's fear for divorce or you're having a hard time with commitment. Not judging!! I think you guys should talk about it and see where it goes. Good luck!
Monica·
You'd still have separate credit, but if anything were to happen to him I think his debtors can come after you as his wife, unless you sign a prenup maybe? (I'm just guessing on that prenup bit.)
Would seeing a therapist/counselor be an option, either alone or together? You're completely allowed to have worries and to not be ready, but maybe a third party can help you figure out exactly what it is that's holding you back, or at least figure out a way to sit and talk to your fiance about it.
Good luck! It is a big commitment, and even though some people may say it's just a piece of paper, a whole load of different expectations and pressure can go along with it. If you're not ready, for whatever reason, you're not ready. Don't let him convince you otherwise!
Mamma Simone·
Мама сына-младенца
We've have a kid and been together for 3 years already. So its definitely not committment. I was raised by a single mom and never seen a married couple around me. So to me it is such a huge thing, it not taken lightly and I do feel like if divorce comes ar ok und I would feel like a failure.
Mamma Simone·
Мама сына-младенца
@nomli thank you for your suggestion. I don't know if I will ever be ready as marriage was never in the cards for me when I envisioned my life. But that's kinda what life does to you.
Mamma Simone·
Мама сына-младенца
Thanks ladies for your comments. They were definitely positive and it just takes me doing some soul searching.
taylo'·
If you're not ready, youre not ready. He needs to understand that.
Mamma Simone·
Мама сына-младенца
Do you ever feel ready? How do you know?