I just found out that my ex, my first boyfriend, committed suicide. I’m a little sad over this…
I just found out that my ex, my first boyfriend, committed suicide. I’m a little sad over this because it all could have been prevented. Granted, from what I have heard the actions he made leading up to it are probably what made him do it. But I should have somehow tried to find him the help he needed. I haven’t talked to him since December of 2014, and we had broken up about 2 years before that, but he would always make comments implying he didn’t want to be alive, and had threatened it when I broke up with him. He had a rough life and I think that played a huge part in his mental instability. But I just wish I had done something when I had the chance. I feel guilty over that. Obviously it’s not my fault, but I just can’t wrap my head around this and help but wonder if I had tried to get him help, if his life would have taken a different path. It hurts my heart that he never found peace and comfort within himself and that he chose to take his own life. May he Rest In Peace.
Tosha Gager·
Многодетная мама (5 детей), беременна
There's nothing u could have done he would've wanted to get help I'm sorry ur feeling bad about it but u really can't help someone that doesn't want it
Steph·
I am sorry. Honestly, I don’t think there is anything you could have done. I pray he is in peace now. Sending prayers for you and for his family.
Melissa·
I am sorry for your loss. Often people don't say anything and leading up the signs may not be notable to the naked eye. In order to be prevented, he would have tried to seek help. I know you feel like you should have known or could have done something.
And even if he reached out, it takes a lot to talk someone down and get help in the moment. I've been there with an ex. Fortunately he did get help and now is married and I'm sure happy. Unfortunately, that's not always the case.
Deleted·
@toshagager1988, @theycallmemommy, @mommyof2girlz, thank you ladies. I know that he struggled a lot within himself and unfortunately there was an incident recently which there was a warrant for an arrest. The next day I find out that he had committed. I know there’s nothing I could have done but it hurts thinking that I didn’t try and things could have possibly turned out differently. We were on speaking terms for a while afterward, but I hadn’t spoke to him since the end of 2014. I wish I had tried to talk to him after that but up until now I had no interest.
Melissa·
@noragra, sounds like he was in a panic and didn't know what to do. Recently in the area I lived similar situations happened where a person was served a section 35(mental health evaluation) and another with a warrant. Both set their homes on fire and barricaded themselves dying. I also feel that police need to be more trained in these type of situations. I used to work for what was called "mobile crisis". I worked with children but I went to homes and hospital ma to assess them and getting the appropriate help they needed. In my state there is an adult version but you have to go on site or to the hospital. My own mil had her own issues where we had tried to go they route. And she would refuse. We went to court and got denied a section. Eventually, it took cutting her off (including us moving, not seeing our daughter) to get her to realize drugs and alcohol was not the road she wanted to stay on. She got the help. She's now been sober 1 year. We recently met at a restaurant so she could meet our oldest. The relationship between my husband and her is still extremely rough. He is very few words. But he's been through this with her on and off majority of his life. But they are slowly working on things. It will be a long time if ever the same but I'm glad she got the help she needed.
I even found her "seeking" while I was at work in the er. That was my breaking point to see her at her low knowing I probably was at work. But still she refused help.
One has to be ready to accept help in order to get it. Otherwise the relapse is much greater.
It's hard knowing you have someone you know and or love in a situation where suicide or addiction is the way out.