Trying to figure out why the past keeps Turn in my face I made a couple mistakes and for that it…

Trying to figure out why the past keeps Turn in my face I made a couple mistakes and for that it feels like you can’t find somebody else to be happy and I do and my mom went all apeshit on me I just want to be loved my kids what a father figure I found an amazing man and because of my mom’s fear and anger towards things I done it’s held over my head I’m struggling tonight and for the first time in three years I have my night myself and I’m crying hopefully when I talk to my boyfriend and feel better but right now I’m struggling