Trigger. Lost baby

Went in for my 20 week check up and found out our son had passed away. Nothing was wrong, my pregnancy has been going great. I'm so numb right now. I'll he delivering him later this week. I don't want to do this. I don't want to do this. Not before Christmas. How am I'm going to tell my kids?? My dear sweet baby boy. Why did this happen?

i hope i have my baby this week...or in a couple of years...if he wants to come out...it's whatever he wants 😓

This is my son Walter. Today is his birthday. He would have been five. This picture was taken when he was 16 days old. He was my first child and my only son (I now have 3 girls). He passed away the next day after this picture from congenital heart failure. It was a miracle that he lived passed 12 weeks gestation because of how severe his heart defects were. I miss him so much, I can't believe it's been 5 years. It still hurts so bad. I don't talk about him a lot out loud because I end up bawling...

Yesterday I went out with my boyfriend went to watch a movie, me and him don't live together yet. but point is yesterday when he was dropping me off his like sleep over at my house witch the mom and dad lives. I said no,

his response was why is everyone deciding or making choices for you and their going to do the same with the baby, when I know that's not true. what he thinks is that my mom tells me not to sleep over. So he left all mad. and I felt in my heart that he went on and cheated on me...

I am so upset! Went for my 33 week checkup and they told me I have 2 stds! I have not been with anyone other than my sons dad and he says he has been faithful to me I have been crying all morning!