Feeling absolutely rubbish about everything. You know when you feel like you're going to cry and then not stop crying I'm feeling like that. My hormones are everywhere my partner is not helping in any way and I feel like I'm just on a very slippy slope downwards at the moment with everything and I don't know what to do @gabilicious xx
Awh bless ya, does sound like you need a hug, have you been feeling like that quite often ? Maybe it's worth talking to your gp get some support, being a mummy etc is hard and all the hormones don't help either I'm here if you ever need a chat, just follow your heart Hun and make sure you're happy cause happy mummy=happy baby xx
Lately to be truthful yeah I have. I've been having meetings about returning to work and I've been stressing about that, money situations, looking for a house we can actually own and then a new car as mine won't last much longer we don't think and then on top of that I'm having a period every 2 weeks! As a result I've been wanting to take luke swimming for about 6 weeks now and every time I say we're going swimming on this day bam period and I can't go. He's almost 5 months and hasn't been swimming once. I just want to feel like a normal human again. My partner goes to football Monday evenings and I don't begrudge him going but then every night he sits at his computer and plays games. But it's not like he'll play one game he'll play for a solid 5 hour period! And during that time you can't pause the game because it loses you your rank apparently. He told me last night that he was just finishing that game and then he'd come to bed. An hour later I went to get a drink from the kitchen and he's still playing! I threw his pillow at the sofa and told him to sleep there in my hormonal sleep deprived state. And then I woke up for luke rolled over to see who was going to go to him and he wasn't there he'd actually slept on the sofa. He's still there now and I've been here on my own crying my eyes out. I wouldn't mind the games but he went out last night. He saw us for all of 40 minutes and came home about midnight. By that point I was tired so went to bed I messaged saying I was going to bed and when he came in he crashed and thumped and woke both luke and myself up and then processed to get into his pj's and climb into bed whilst luke cried obviously leading to a big argument. And apparently it's all my fault because I get tired so easily! I never go out i don't do anything but look after luke. I don't have any friends anymore none of my old friends talk to me since having luke. I just feel so lonely and that. I'm seeing the GP tomorrow so hopefully he'll be able to help me @gabilicious xx
Awh no that sounds horrible hun, definitely speak to a doctor how you been feeling and your periods etc, as for your partner he's a grown man he should know better how to act not like a bratty teenager, have you two ever sat down and spoken about this ? Is it his way of dealing with stress of having a baby or is he just acting like that because he can't be asked, it ain't fair on you it takes two to make a baby and two to look after one, I understand he works and yes it's hard etc but you work 24/7 by looking after both of yours child, cleaning, cooking etc, and when you get back to work it'll only be harder as you'll be working then you'll come back home and have to do all that on top, he lucky he has it easy, needs to definitely buckle up his ideas you and Luke are more important than some poxy online rank or a football game, it's like if my partner wants to play games on PS4 he does it either while Caitlin is having a nap or while I'm putting her to bed even then it'll be 2 hours max after helping me with the rest of the things that needs doing, and then he's up at 4am again to go to work. Do you ever go out on dates anymore or does he have daddy and luke days ? Might be worth giving it a shot, men can be like big babies and sometimes might feel pushed out etc because all of our time is being taken over by our little ones, I know it sounds silly but you never know, you both need to talk about this and how you both feel etc, stay strong Hun having a baby is hard and takes its toll on the relationship xx
I tried talking to him about it and it works for a couple of days then everything is back to the way it was before. He waits until luke is in bed which is better but then I feel like it's me that he doesn't want to be around. We haven't been on a date since December and he'll only have time with luke if I'm going out for something to do with my friends wedding. I've asked him to organise a date night as I do it every time and for once I was like can I be surprised by what we do but that's hit the fan already. Just don't know what to do. I can hear him up and about but he hasn't even come to see us yet @gabilicious xx
I feel for you. The first few months is a real strain on any relationship. You do need him to be willing to work at it with you though. Men feel so much stress but in different ways to us. Sit down, with a cuppa & explain again how you 2 need to compromise & work together with these issues. My husband has 2 games nights a week. He can be on it for as long as he wants (once the boys are in bed). I don't care I do my own thing. But the rest of the week we spend our evenings together. It's easy to fall in bad routines but remind him it's so important to be a couple. We used to have date nights but since Max it's kinda not happening so we have to try our hardest with what we have lol. Let him get up one morning while you sleep in. Let him have Luke now & then while you pop into town for a coffee or bit of shopping. If he's repeatedly ignoring you & unwilling to compromise with these issues then you need to ask yourself the question. Is worth it? Are you happy to stay with someone like that if things don't change...
I'm going to start saying to him that. He can pick two nights where he plays his games but the rest of the time it would be nice to spend time with him. I don't think he realises that majority of the day I don't get to talk to anyone. As luke is so little I literally talk to myself whilst he's at work but he doesn't see it. Guess we'll see what happens thanks girls xx
Gabi·
What's wrong hun x
Jess·
Мама сына-младенца
Feeling absolutely rubbish about everything. You know when you feel like you're going to cry and then not stop crying I'm feeling like that. My hormones are everywhere my partner is not helping in any way and I feel like I'm just on a very slippy slope downwards at the moment with everything and I don't know what to do @gabilicious xx
Gabi·
Awh bless ya, does sound like you need a hug, have you been feeling like that quite often ? Maybe it's worth talking to your gp get some support, being a mummy etc is hard and all the hormones don't help either I'm here if you ever need a chat, just follow your heart Hun and make sure you're happy cause happy mummy=happy baby xx
Jess·
Мама сына-младенца
Lately to be truthful yeah I have. I've been having meetings about returning to work and I've been stressing about that, money situations, looking for a house we can actually own and then a new car as mine won't last much longer we don't think and then on top of that I'm having a period every 2 weeks! As a result I've been wanting to take luke swimming for about 6 weeks now and every time I say we're going swimming on this day bam period and I can't go. He's almost 5 months and hasn't been swimming once. I just want to feel like a normal human again. My partner goes to football Monday evenings and I don't begrudge him going but then every night he sits at his computer and plays games. But it's not like he'll play one game he'll play for a solid 5 hour period! And during that time you can't pause the game because it loses you your rank apparently. He told me last night that he was just finishing that game and then he'd come to bed. An hour later I went to get a drink from the kitchen and he's still playing! I threw his pillow at the sofa and told him to sleep there in my hormonal sleep deprived state. And then I woke up for luke rolled over to see who was going to go to him and he wasn't there he'd actually slept on the sofa. He's still there now and I've been here on my own crying my eyes out. I wouldn't mind the games but he went out last night. He saw us for all of 40 minutes and came home about midnight. By that point I was tired so went to bed I messaged saying I was going to bed and when he came in he crashed and thumped and woke both luke and myself up and then processed to get into his pj's and climb into bed whilst luke cried obviously leading to a big argument. And apparently it's all my fault because I get tired so easily! I never go out i don't do anything but look after luke. I don't have any friends anymore none of my old friends talk to me since having luke. I just feel so lonely and that. I'm seeing the GP tomorrow so hopefully he'll be able to help me @gabilicious xx
Jess·
Мама сына-младенца
I'm sorry for the essay hun xx
Gabi·
Awh no that sounds horrible hun, definitely speak to a doctor how you been feeling and your periods etc, as for your partner he's a grown man he should know better how to act not like a bratty teenager, have you two ever sat down and spoken about this ? Is it his way of dealing with stress of having a baby or is he just acting like that because he can't be asked, it ain't fair on you it takes two to make a baby and two to look after one, I understand he works and yes it's hard etc but you work 24/7 by looking after both of yours child, cleaning, cooking etc, and when you get back to work it'll only be harder as you'll be working then you'll come back home and have to do all that on top, he lucky he has it easy, needs to definitely buckle up his ideas you and Luke are more important than some poxy online rank or a football game, it's like if my partner wants to play games on PS4 he does it either while Caitlin is having a nap or while I'm putting her to bed even then it'll be 2 hours max after helping me with the rest of the things that needs doing, and then he's up at 4am again to go to work. Do you ever go out on dates anymore or does he have daddy and luke days ? Might be worth giving it a shot, men can be like big babies and sometimes might feel pushed out etc because all of our time is being taken over by our little ones, I know it sounds silly but you never know, you both need to talk about this and how you both feel etc, stay strong Hun having a baby is hard and takes its toll on the relationship xx
Jess·
Мама сына-младенца
I tried talking to him about it and it works for a couple of days then everything is back to the way it was before. He waits until luke is in bed which is better but then I feel like it's me that he doesn't want to be around. We haven't been on a date since December and he'll only have time with luke if I'm going out for something to do with my friends wedding. I've asked him to organise a date night as I do it every time and for once I was like can I be surprised by what we do but that's hit the fan already. Just don't know what to do. I can hear him up and about but he hasn't even come to see us yet @gabilicious xx
Sara-Louise·
I feel for you. The first few months is a real strain on any relationship. You do need him to be willing to work at it with you though. Men feel so much stress but in different ways to us. Sit down, with a cuppa & explain again how you 2 need to compromise & work together with these issues. My husband has 2 games nights a week. He can be on it for as long as he wants (once the boys are in bed). I don't care I do my own thing. But the rest of the week we spend our evenings together. It's easy to fall in bad routines but remind him it's so important to be a couple. We used to have date nights but since Max it's kinda not happening so we have to try our hardest with what we have lol. Let him get up one morning while you sleep in. Let him have Luke now & then while you pop into town for a coffee or bit of shopping. If he's repeatedly ignoring you & unwilling to compromise with these issues then you need to ask yourself the question. Is worth it? Are you happy to stay with someone like that if things don't change...
Jess·
Мама сына-младенца
I'm going to start saying to him that. He can pick two nights where he plays his games but the rest of the time it would be nice to spend time with him. I don't think he realises that majority of the day I don't get to talk to anyone. As luke is so little I literally talk to myself whilst he's at work but he doesn't see it. Guess we'll see what happens thanks girls xx
Gabi·
I'm so sorry you're going through this @sara-lou, is right hun hope you get this sorted and he starts working with you xx