When Tinley's sperm donor decided to just move away without letting me know m, and without trying to…
When Tinley's sperm donor decided to just move away without letting me know m, and without trying to see her I always said I would never take him for child support, for the simple fact I don't ever want him around her. When we found out she wasn't a boy he decided right then that he was done with me, so why should he get the opportunity to be around her? Well anyways, when I filed with the DHHR for help, I had to automatically file for child support. I filed a few weeks after I had Tinley, so I would be able to buy her diapers an everything. While he was in Indiana the child support people wouldn't even bother to try to find him, which I was fine with it. Well now that he is back in Wv my mom told me to call them and tell them, so I did. But now that he is back and it's going to be much easier for them to get ahold of him, I can't help but to sit and just cry. The way his now ex gf talks, I do believe he is back on drugs. I'm sure when we do end up going to court he will ask for visitations, and I don't want him seeing Tinley at all. He disappeared when I was almost 16 weeks, Tinley is now 5 months old. He has NEVER tried to ask about her or be around her. He doesn't even know her name. I know him not being around is already a big advantage for me, but I'm still worried about the outcome. My Facebook has all the messages between me and him when I would try to talk to him about her, but he would just always talk down to me and say he wanted a DNA test. I always told him to take me to court for one, but he never would, bc he knows she is his, he was just trying to be a hard ass around what is now his ex.
Have anyone ever been through this or something similar? I'm worrying myself to death!
Elisa Larrea·
Мама сына-младенца
This is so sad! I am sure you are very strong and can support your daughter on your own. -Easier said than done I know- I would see if you can have him sign off on all of his parental rights and be out of your life for good. Specially if he has drug problems. Or maybe if you take him to court they can mediate a solution for you and let you know what options you have for him to have to help you financially but not be part of her life without supervised visits. Just a couple of thoughts.
Brittany·
Мама дочки-младенца
My dad wants me to see if he will sign his rights over also, but I don't think he would. && even if they give him supervised visits they would do them at the DHHR, but make me leave during the visits, and that wouldn't go well. I can't even walk across the room without Tinley on my hip. If I'm not around or she's not with me, she does nothing but scream and cry. I don't want to put her through that, especially with someone she doesn't even know. I called child support today to give them his physical address, but they were closed and I'm low key glad they were. @elisalarrea
Elisa Larrea·
Мама сына-младенца
I don't think they should make you leave for the visits; at least until she has become familiar with him if you decide you want him to be a part of her life. It seems you are in a difficult situation; it feels you have a good support system with your family and maybe you should try and see if he would sign the papers. You never know unless you ask and better to know what the situation is from early on than for him to just show up 4-6 years down the road.
Elisa Larrea·
Мама сына-младенца
Btw love her name! Tinley; very nice and whimsical
emily·
Мама сына-младенца
Girl yeah. I know how you feel. My ex and I had been together 5 years and he was supportive my whole pregnancy pretty much. Toward the end he started acting strange sometimes like would be constantly falling asleep or just all up in his phone. He stopped going to work. Then when Oakley was about 2.5 months old he literally vanished for 2 weeks. Didn't call, text, nothing. Wouldn't respond to me. He ended up coming back and saying oh you guys are my world idk what I was thinking I was just at SO and so's house drinking (something he had NEVER done our whole relationship). But I was like ok whatever. But then he just starts ignoring me again and constantly would call me a bitch for "telling him what to do" when I would ask for help w the baby. We ended up breaking up finally. He told me I'm "not getting his fucking money and not taking his son from him" but he has not once in 2 months tried to contact me about seeing Oakley. Doesn't ask how he is. Since we broke up I had to move home and find work full time and then full time daycare. Since I just started working I haven't gotten paid yet so I'm literally going into debt because I'm working. I had to make an appt to file for child support but it's not until this coming Monday, then a court date won't even be set until February is what I was told. I have no idea what to do, my dad went off on me yesterday about how me working is costing him money because he offered to pay for a month of daycare up front. So beyond stressed. If he gets even visitation rights I'm gonna seriously cry, Oakley won't even know who he is anymore.
Brittany·
Мама дочки-младенца
Aw, I'm sorry you have to go through that! I hope everything works out the way you want it to. If we lived closer to each other and got to know each other I'd watch Oakley in a heartbeat. I love babies and it would give Tinley company. She's never around any babies. Lol. @emkasting