I am about to lose my fucking mind. I don't understand why everything is constantly going wrong when…

I am about to lose my fucking mind. I don't understand why everything is constantly going wrong when I am consistently trying to be a better person, mother, and Christian. I pray all day every single day, and I try and keep positive outlook about everything. but it's like a domino affect, one thing happens then multiple other things happen to cause me stress, and upset me. I'm trying to do the best that I can in school but it feels absolutely fucking impossible. And to top it off, I have work due at midnight and my computer died and won't turn back on. Jaxtyn won't stay asleep more than 5 fucking minutes and I haven't slept in a week. I feel like I am barely existing, and I just want to go hide and cry myself to sleep. I'm so utterly miserable for the most part. Any second I even start to gain any confidence and think "I got this" BOOM, everything shatters to pieces and I just don't understand why. I hate feeling like this and sounding like some depressed idiot, who can't handle anything, but I don't have anywhere else to vent at the moment. 😥