*I* am one bad ass mama.

*I* am one bad ass mama.

Yes, I'm tooting my own horn. Why? Let me tell you a little bit about my life as a mother.

I've got 5 kids that I'd do anything for. I always have sacrificed everything for my kids and put them first. Even in the hardest times of my life, my biggest struggles (and there have been OH so many) I have always remained focused on my goal of being the best mom I can be. This past year was one of the hardest years of my life in every single aspect possible. Ive fought the deepest, darkest forms of depression, anxiety, and panic attacks, medicine free. I went through a pretty difficult, yet blessed and miraculous, pregnancy. I delivered via emergency c-section almost 2 months early and watched my baby boy grow up for over a month in the NICU, which was over an hour and 15 minutes from me. I used to go see him every day, sometimes twice every day. I didn't want to leave his side. I lost contact completely with my oldest daughter and mother over the past year. I became estranged from my entire family and was left with nobody but my husband and children. I went through my daughter practically being violently raped, become suicidal, struggle with eating disorders and other self harm issues. I sought help for her and helped her to the end. She is17, and has put me through hell over the past couple of years....but God knives she's my heart, and I miss her more than words can ever say, and I love her to the ends of the earth. My mini me. 💔 My 15 year old was diagnosed this year with a right bundle branch block, a severe and critical heart deformity and condition that she will be dealing with for the rest of her life. She also has vaso vagal syncope, where she passes out randomly as a result of the heart condition. My 12 year old is having a hard time with depression, which as you may have gathered by now runs in the family. My 13 year old son is putting me through hell every SINGLE day, but I love him to death, always and forever. He was my first born son, and will always hold my heart. Two of my pregnancies (my 13 yr old and the baby) were not easy, and this last delivery nearly killed me. But here I am. Anyone who knows me knows my kids are my life. Hopefully, someday, my kids understand why I've done some of the things I've done, and all the sacrifices I've made, for them.

This is just a little taste of my everyday life. You have no idea the struggle. But I would go through any and all of it as many times as it takes to know my children are okay in the end. I live for them. They are my world, and I see my life in their eyes. To me, being their mama is everything.

The devil may try to run me through hell all he wants. With Jesus on my side, I WILL PREVAIL.

#momlifephotos