What an eventful last 30 minutes I've had. As I'm making the salad for tomorrow, my dog has diarrhea on the kitchen…

What an eventful last 30 minutes I've had. As I'm making the salad for tomorrow, my dog has diarrhea on the kitchen floor right behind me. And then as I'm attempting to clean it up, I puke everywhere... Guess my stomach isn't as tough as I thought it would be with poop. So then I have poop and puke to clean up. Well as I'm tackling this shit/vomit duo, a fucking Beatle/spider ...idk what it was but it charges me and luckily I had the vacuum close by cause I sucked it up. I don't know how to describe how petrified of bugs I am. As I'm finishing vacuuming I heard a hiss and I swear to god it had to have been another bug. So here I am, trying not to bawl my eyes out. And believe it or not, this is not my hormones. Pregnant or not I'd probably be acting just as crazy. Fun times