Little rant here but I hate that I am so insecure about myself, it eats me up inside and controls my…

Little rant here but I hate that I am so insecure about myself, it eats me up inside and controls my life. I know that my boyfriend basically watches porn every night (we never have sex anymore because my drive is pretty much gone) and it seriously bothers me. I hate the thought of him looking at women in that way, I feel that he should only have eyes for me only like that. And if you're here to tell me that it's just how guys are wired than I absolutely do not want to hear it. I feel so unattractive lately after having this baby, I don't know what else to do. My boyfriend tries to have sex with me but I reject it because I just don't want to. I feel awful about it all. I feel awful about a lot of things. 😢