I went from being mad at my sister to being sad about my angel baby. because Jr was all over the…

I went from being mad at my sister to being sad about my angel baby. because Jr was all over the place kicking and he went over to Joel's side and I said to him "don't be messing with your brother" then the sadness set in. most days I'm fine and I try to be strong and encourage my s/o because he's having a really hard time dealing with our loss but tonight, cleaning the kitchen...I had to go back and look at some ultrasounds of Joel to feel better. its weird that looking at his pictures makes me feel better but it does. this is going to be a long journey. I remember the day I found out I was by myself and crying all day no one to talk to not even you all. my mom walked in the door to see me crying and thought I was fighting with my s/o...its so hard not to think about it! trying to stay positive and happy because I still have Jr. but a loss is a loss. its just hard being the strong one and knowing that my boyfriend is having such a hard time with it too.