so irritated. Last night I started crying for no reason and Alex jumped down my throat and was in my…

so irritated. Last night I started crying for no reason and Alex jumped down my throat and was in my face telling me I'm stupid because I didn't know what I was crying about and so I went to the room and she's like what's your problem?! and I was like maybe if I had help around here because I'm in pain!! She said its been 6 weeks since you had her you're fine! no hon I'm not fine, I'm pretty sure the epidural fucked my back up permanently and I'm thinking my stitches are infected because I'm having green discharge and it burns when I pee, and I would love to spend just one ONE day in bed resting like I was supposed to since I've been home from giving birth to Emery, but have I? nope. all I do is run run run and I never sleep and I'm trying not to be depressed but its taking its toll on me. :( sigh