I've never been so excited to go to work. 🙌🙌🙌 I feel really bad for saying this because I love my…

I've never been so excited to go to work.

🙌🙌🙌

I feel really bad for saying this because I love my daughter more than anything on earth. I would do anything for my baby girl. But dear god I feel miserable. I feel like I've completely lost myself. I'm not amanda. I'm not a wife. I'm not educated or able bodied. I'm just mom. And I love being mom really I do. But I just need to know I'm still me too. I don't party or drink or go out. I crochet and read books and go to work and I just do little things but all night at day I can't do anything I want I just have to be mom. make a bottle, change a poopy diaper, rock to sleep, make a bottle change a poopy diaper rock to sleep make a bottle change more poop.

😢😢😢

I'm loosing my mind. I have no help with this baby. I don't have family who can really watch her. I'm just overwhelmed.

I wouldn't trade being Eloise mom for anything I just didn't know I'd loose my sense of self.

I've got so many things I need to do and I can't focus even in the few seconds I get because I feel so wrong. I have never felt less me.

I feel so absolutely terrible for saying all this but moms I need to know I'm OK so badly