Trigger. Lost baby

Went in for my 20 week check up and found out our son had passed away. Nothing was wrong, my pregnancy has been going great. I'm so numb right now. I'll he delivering him later this week. I don't want to do this. I don't want to do this. Not before Christmas. How am I'm going to tell my kids?? My dear sweet baby boy. Why did this happen?

Yesterday I went out with my boyfriend went to watch a movie, me and him don't live together yet. but point is yesterday when he was dropping me off his like sleep over at my house witch the mom and dad lives. I said no,

his response was why is everyone deciding or making choices for you and their going to do the same with the baby, when I know that's not true. what he thinks is that my mom tells me not to sleep over. So he left all mad. and I felt in my heart that he went on and cheated on me...

Motherhood ripped from me again...

I went for my Anatomy Scan on Friday @ 20wks. I went in expecting to find out if my baby is a boy or girl, but came out feeling like I'm going to die.

!!!!LABOR STORY!!!!

Saturday at 1AM, lost my mucus plug/bloody show, and I was freaking out! A couple of hours later I had cramping, but felt like BH just a little stronger. They came and went, but felt stronger with each hour. Didn't sleep that whole night! I called the midwife at my hospital and told her I lost it and was having really bad cramping and she told me I was fine and was prob just having BH contractions.

The next day I was having what I thought were strong BH contractions every 10-...

Bump pic. 14 weeks 2 days ! I'm showing alot earlier with my boy than I did with my girl !excuse the background, I'm at work, im a painter, and one of my workers said boss you're getting pudgy !! 😋😋 so I had to go take a look in the mirror!