I'm sad and I need to vent. So here goes.

I'm sad and I need to vent. So here goes.

I wish I had taken maternity photos. I have 2 weeks, maybe less, until my little girl is here. I don't have the money for a professional photo shoot and I don't want to have a family member or friend take them and take the chance on having shitty pictures. I wish hubby was here making pregnancy memories with me. He's felt our daughter kick once and he hardly talks to me about the pregnancy. Whenever we talk, it's either about his job, guns, or his stupid ass "friends" and their stupid ass mistakes. If I try to talk about the pregnancy, he acknowledges what I've said for all of 30 seconds and then changes the subject. And when he's home, all he wants to do is play WoW, sleep, or cuddle with the dog. I've tried so hard to talk him out of buying this stupid gun that he doesn't need because we need the money for other things, like baby stuff and saving to buy the house from my dad, but he doesn't listen to me. If I spent money on the things I wanted, I'd get bitched at for it. Like I'd love to go get my nails done because I've been wanting to get them done for months, but I don't because, even tho it'll only cost like $35, that's money that could go to more important things. He's so focused on his wants that our needs are nowhere near being taken care of. I'm at my wits end. I'm trying so hard not have a breakdown and freak out when I'm so close to having my daughter and I can't take it anymore. My parents have been a huge help with getting the nursery painted and putting the floor in it since hubby hasn't been home to do it. He literally has not been here this entire pregnancy. Like I said, he's felt her kick once and doesn't talk about her with me. Even tho I have my parents here with me, I feel so alone. I don't feel like I'm in a relationship anymore. I love him to death and I really appreciate that he's working so hard, but I wish he was home. I've always told myself that I would never do a long distance relationship because they're too hard to maintain and I have never been more right about something in my life. It's so hard going through this pregnancy without her father, my fiance, here by my side. Idk what to do anymore. My daughter is the only thing keeping me going at this point. I just wish I had been able to do all the fun pregnancy things and experience it all with him here. And I don't think we will have anymore kids, so this was my one chance to experience that stuff and I missed out on all of it.