This has been my afternoon: I was thinking maybe if I fed Cannon before he got fussy, he'd go right…

This has been my afternoon: I was thinking maybe if I fed Cannon before he got fussy, he'd go right back to sleep so I could get a little nap in.. when I picked him up, he smelt poopy so I decided to change him first. As soon as I open the diaper poop shoots all over me, the couch, everywhere! It was unstoppable. We take a bath, and get dressed but as soon as he starts eating BAM another blowout. (This time slightly more contained) Change him and his clothes AGAIN, get him latched back on and he spits up all over the both of us. Jesus take the wheel. At this point I'm contemplating taking a nap in my spit up booby milk t-shirt, or being okay with not getting one at all.