Even though I sometimes hate and wish the father of baby K would disappear I love him. I never slept…

Even though I sometimes hate and wish the father of baby K would disappear I love him. I never slept with anyone but him & I guess that's why I'm crazy about him. I finally decided to give him some today & now I'm extremely happy but sad all at once. I hate how I can never control myself with him 😭🖕🏽