So. My boyfriend has not seen his son in about 3 years. No one knows where the mother and son is. We…
So. My boyfriend has not seen his son in about 3 years. No one knows where the mother and son is. We hear rumors they live here or there..She has blocked all friends and family on facebook. My boyfriend really wants to see his child. He pays about $550 a month for child support. I know visitation and child support are two different things..another thing is that we just had a baby. Obviously that means my daughter has a big brother..who's about 5. I would like them to know each other...or at least know about each other. I have never spoken to this woman. I don't know her. She and my boyfriend ended on bad terms. I'd like to contact her but I'm not sure how to approach the situation and if that would be okay on my part. I'm also afraid it may make the situation between them worse. How would you do it? I dont plan on being mean or bitchy. I'm not looking for a fight. I'd like my daughter to have a relationship with her brother. By the way I have not spoke to my boyfriend about this yet. It's all up in the air.
Manna·
Мама дочки-младенца
I would say it just like that. Make it clear the ball is in her court, but that you would really love for your daughter to know her older brother. Also tell her whether the dad is there or not is up to her(she may decide later that he too can be part of it, but she may have her reasons as to why she doesn't want him around)
Sounds harsh, I know. But if you want to make it happen, make most of the decisions hers. Otherwise she make feel threatened. Also, you definitely should talk to your boyfriend before contact.
shewolf2015·
Мама дочки-младенца
okay. it's a very touchy subject with him. I'm super afraid I'll make it worse. They haven't spoken in years. We think she is in another state. He still has rights. Also I'm not sure if she even knows of me and our baby..
Manna·
Мама дочки-младенца
I would at least give her the option. If it is important to you. And if it's too much for him, then I wouldn't push it. I think there's a lot of hurt and if you push him too far it may not work out too great as far as your relationship goes. Have you talked to him before about wanting your baby to see her brother?
I'm sure if they have any mutual friends at all, she knows. But either way, you have to know when not to push. If your boyfriend tells you no, don't do it.
shewolf2015·
Мама дочки-младенца
I haven't brought it up..but I'm sure he has already thought about it. I'm waiting for the right time to bring it up. I'd never go behind his back with this
Manna·
Мама дочки-младенца
Good. I know I have friends who would and I'm just like, damn! Bitch move!
I don't think there will be a good time. However, you may say that you've been thinking about it, and whatever he wants to do, you'll go with it. But that you want him to think about it for sure. And if he wants to talk about it, pros and cons or whatever, you've got him. He may just be scared.