*question* So my boyfriend and I are working on our birth plan and we are arguing about who is…

I personally feel it's up to you. I'm having my fiance and my mother in the room. his mom won't be in the room. you can always have a discussion with the hospital and tell them who YOUD like to be there. and even tell them who will not be allowed in the room.

When it comes to labor and delivery they should give you like a packet with all this information for you to fill out saying who you want in the room who is in charge of you in case something happens since he's only your boyfriend he's not your husband I don't think he has much say I think your parents would have more say over that but ask your hospital where you're delivering for that package and basically fill out all the information for who can be there before and after and all that stuff so you won't have an issue at the end of the day it's what makes YOU comfortable

how old are you? I would say since yall won't be married, then he will have no say so over anything, I believe it will be up to your parents to make any decisions... & your the one giving birth girl, you should be able to pick who you want in the room, and if you don't feel comfortable with his mom in there I would just tell him... it will be about making you comfortable so you can safely give birth and be comfortable instead of nervous or worried about whose in the room!

I think that if he's ur husband then that's when he can make decisions , otherwise the parents do - unless you let the hospital know who can make last minute decisions . If needed , and it's your choice who comes into the room , your legs will be spread eagle and it's your moment , you decide. My mother and hubby were in the room and my MIL waited outside because it's my body and I decide who I'm comfortable around . I think it's your choice . And maybe you should discuss it with him .

im 19, and ive always been a more sensitive, fragile girl and my parents are just worried about if something happens. Im upset because when i told him how my parents felt about him making any important decisions about my life, he got SO defensive.

Oh wow! It's ultimately up to you but I think you should allow his mom to be there because you both are having that little one. You will be getting married to this man also so try to compromise. I would think that if anything happens to you, your parents will have the legal rights of what happens since you are not married yet

If you put him down as the person to make decisions if something happens and you can't then yes he will be able to make the decisions. I know you may not feel comfortable around his mom but take a step back and think that this is her grandbaby also and her sons life is changing. I understand why you want your mom in there and I understand why he wants his mom also. If you absolutely don't want her in there then it may be best to compromise and it just be you and him. Yes you are the one giving birth but it's his child also.

@preggimama, Legally your parents are your next of kin and therefore would be the ones to make decisions. If you won't be married by then and you want your boyfriend to make the decisions for you in the event something goes wrong, you need an Advanced Healthcare Directive. It is a legal document you can do yourself by finding one online and having it notarized. A lot of hospitals and doctors offices offer the ability for you to do a directive through them as well. You'd just need to ask.

its not more of him wanting his mom in there. He wants it just him and i. but when i said i wanted my mom in there, its like he is just saying then i want my mom in there. He knows i dont want her in there. ive only been dating him for 7 months, and have only seen his family a handful of times. He always talks crap about her and fights with her. i told him everyone can visit afterwards, i just want my mom in the room. @hward12

@preggimama, My boyfriend and I aren't married, but I still have an Advanced Healthcare Directive that gives complete authority to my mom in the event that something happens to me. My boyfriend understands this and trusts my decision and my mom to make the right decisions. It's just something you guys need to talk about. It's scary to think about, but it will give you peace of mind that the right person is making the right decision for your welfare.

i just think my boyfriend doesnt understand why i want my mom in the room and not his. so frustrating!