It's so hard sometimes living with the man your in love with and carrying his child but not together…

It's so hard sometimes living with the man your in love with and carrying his child but not together anymore. It's sucks even more when he is so good to me :/ I just want to say I love you and kiss and hold him but I can't and that's what hurts the most. Then I keeping. Thinking about when sophie gets here what things will be like for us. I just can't wait to have our baby so I can go back to work and move out asap my heart is an open wound right now and seeing him everyday is hurting me so much. We sleep in the same bed well he sleeps I just lay here till I'm exhausted and pass out. I'm just so lost idk what to do. Sometimes I wanna yell and beat sense into him but other times I am so greatful for him. Does any of this make sense?