Mom.life
Are there any single mums to be on here? Finding it difficult to deal with baby's father at the moment :/ xx
30.04.2015
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jumpingjellybeans
Yes, there is so much to consider. If I had of known the trouble I would have had, honestly I would not have bother pushing for a relationship between him and my son. It has caused ds1 a lot of pain and disappointment but every@body has different stories and issues.
I wish you all the luck now and in the future you will get there I am sure 💗
30.04.2015 Нравится Ответить
jadejmb
Thanks hun, I've got no problem with him being on the birth certificate, but I want baby to have my last name. I'll let you know how I get on 😂. @jumpingjellybeans xxx
30.04.2015 Нравится Ответить
jumpingjellybeans
Approx £42.75 a week sorry
30.04.2015 Нравится Ответить
jumpingjellybeans
I get £175 a month I know he could afford more but it is proving it. As a rule CSA before they were abolished recommended 10% of paying parents income for maintenance. On the second name subject, birth certificate etc if father isn't named on birth certificate he loses parental responsibility- easier in future if you meet a new partner etc - minus's you may find it harder to get maintenance visitation rights for him as he wouldn't be named parent. Not sure if you had thought much on that. We have had a long bumpy road and it hasn't always been easy. After 8years we are starting to get there. He was very controlling even though we weren't together but now I am married things have settled down again but when I first got married it caused a lot of grief! From him!
30.04.2015 Нравится Ответить
jadejmb
Yeah well if you think of a tub of baby milk being £10 then £10 a week isn't really enough is it, I'll try and negotiate with baby's father.. Thanks for the advice @emmyrxox
30.04.2015 Нравится Ответить
emmyrxox
Emily🌹·Мама двоих (9 лет, 10 лет)
My Mum gets £10 a week maintenance for my brother & sister. I personally think it should be more as things cost loads, but they agreed this between them without going through court. I'd say more like £20 a week. Same amount roughly as you'd get if you get child benefits. xx
30.04.2015 Нравится Ответить
jadejmb
I haven't got a clue how much maintenance to ask for either.. Any ideas?? Xxx
30.04.2015 Нравится Ответить
jadejmb
Thanks for the advice! I need to tell him that baby won't have his last name.. He's not going to be happy with that but I've carried baby for 9 months on my own and we aren't together so I don't see the problem with it but I think he's quite old fashioned and will expect baby to have his last name. We are really amicable which is great but I know there will be more difficulties to come. Xx
30.04.2015 Нравится Ответить
jumpingjellybeans
I was a single mum with ds1 the dad was in the delivery room and my mum too, though I wish he wasn't he wasn't supportive. And we broke up shortly after ds1 was born. I was a working single mum for 6 years and ds1's son has been on the scene to be a father (of sorts) to him. Advice it is hard and you need to sort out maintenance and visitation amicably if you can't I would suggest mediation. I am now happily married to my new fella we have ds1 with us, our ds2 and baby 3 on the way. Good Communication is key and try not to be bitter and argue in front of the kids. @jadejmb
30.04.2015 Нравится Ответить
sarahlou
sarahlou·Мама дочки (10 лет)
@jadejmb, hopefully he's being genuinely nice and maybe just tell him how your feeling because my baby's dad will not even answer my texts and refuses to talk to me which I'm ok with now because I'm gonna be the best mum/dad so my baby girl won't miss him so hope just be open with him and he'll tell u what he's thinking
30.04.2015 Нравится Ответить
jadejmb
@sarahlou
30.04.2015 Нравится Ответить
jadejmb
I don't know what mine is playing at. I told him a few weeks ago that I wasn't having him in the delivery room and he wasn't happy but he's ok now. But he keeps asking me to go out for food or he buys me stuff.. And I can't work out whether he is trying to get me back or generally trying to be nice. Because he doesn't really come near me at all either, I can't tell what's going on! It messes with my head though 😞. @da rahlou
30.04.2015 Нравится Ответить
sarahlou
sarahlou·Мама дочки (10 лет)
@jadejmb, hey I know how your feeling . I've given up trying to talk to my baby's dad :/
30.04.2015 Нравится Ответить
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