MY STORY: ***LONG*** So i was "talking" to this guy for about a yr before I got pregnant by my…

MY STORY: ***LONG*** So i was "talking" to this guy for about a yr before I got pregnant by my child's father. I've known my child's father for years, way before I met the guy I was talking to, but never really liked my childs father "like that" partly because he kept too much girl company, amongst other things. He always liked me way more than I liked him. We'd lost contact over the yrs and met up again last summer during a vacation/my friends wedding. To make a long story short, we(child's father) "reconnected" and baby girl is soon to make her debut. Now back to the guy I had been talking to for a yr, we were really building and getting to know each other etc. For the first time in my life, I met somebody and we just fit. The feelings were mutual and genuine and I definitely saw myself marrying him. I even considered relocating after I graduated school and finding a job closer to him so that we could be closer (He lives 8hrs away from me). During the duration of talking to him, I had been celibate for two yrs and wanted the next man I gave my body to, to be my husband. I was studying my bible and trying to live a set apart lifestyle. However in a moment of weakness (and loneliness) while on vacation I had sex with my child's father and became pregnant. As soon as I found out I was pregnant, I told the guy I had been talking to and I was so scared. He was hurt and I felt like the worst person for hurting him. I told him that if he stopped talking to me, I wouldnt blame him. FAST FORWARD: Throughout my pregnancy he (the guy I was talking to before I got pregnant) he has been keeping in touch with me. Calling me during the week, texting me etc and I was grateful that he was even talking to me, but of course it never was the same (i'm pregnant with another mans baby) so for a little while I took what I could get. Through out my pregnancy I've been honest with him about how my child's father and I aren't together etc because apart of me still hoped that we could go back to the way things were or at least some version of it, but today was the wake up call and realization that we probably need to go our separate ways. I got upset abt something I should of legitimately been upset abt and he says "your in no position to be mad, you're the one pregnant, not me". As if holding animosity towards me still and basically I need to take what I can get from him because "I'm the one that's pregnant". so I responded "I'm pregnant not desperate, dumb or ugly!" Im tired of walking on egg shells. I repented and have asked for forgiveness from my father in heaven for what I've done and who I've hurt, and I wholeheartedly believe that I have been forgiven. I refuse to continue to feel guilty for something that happened and that I can't change and have apologized for. I'm a package deal now, and if he grudges me now, he'll most likely grudge my baby when shes born and no matter the circumstances surrounding how she was conceived, she is mine and apart of me and is innocent. So I basically think I need to leave him alone. Yes, I would have liked for things to turn out differently, but this is my reality. This is what it is. Either stick around or leave, don't play the middle ground. Story over